Music of My Heart
by lovelylynn21
Summary: Bella and Jasper fall for each other, but Edwards feelings for Bella are just as strong as ever. Only 3 problems, Ed's with Alice. Bella hates Edward, and Jasper doesn't want Edward anywhere near Bella. Who will win Bellas heart, or will it be broken? BXJ
1. Hi, I'm Bella

**BPOV**

"Wake up Bella! It's time for school!" My dad Charlie called from downstairs, man if only he wasn't a police chief I could become a truant.

"I'm up dad!" I yelled back. Man I really didn't want to go today. It was bad enough I had to be at another school, worse that I was starting in the middle of the year. That only meant that people were already going to be set in their ways, and have their clicks already picked out.

Regardless of all these, I pulled myself out of the bed, and stalked over to my bathroom. I let the hot water run until I saw steam coming from above the curtain of the shower, and dipped in.

The water felt amazing, it woke my up almost immediately. I washed my hair first, and then put in the conditioner so I could let it sit while I took care of everything else. Then I washed out the conditioner.

I quickly towel dried my hair until it was only a little damp and then slipped into a pair of jeans, and a light grey hoody with white stripes. I figured I'd just let my hair air dry, no real reason to do it, no one I wanted to impress was at this school. All my friends were back home in Phoenix.

"You ready yet Bells?" My dad called up the stairs.

"Yeah!" I yelled back down.

"Good then I'm off! Make sure you're not late, and keep an eye on the speedometer of that truck, Jake said it was a little iffy." My dad said.

"Alright." I said, and I heard the front door close.

"My truck." I said, and I couldn't help but let a giddy laugh escape my lips. I had gotten a truck upon moving here to Forks with my father, and it was mine. I could drive to school now.

I looked at the clock; it flashed 7:21; time to go. I dashed outside and hopped into my truck and smiled as I put the key into the ignition and heard it rumble to life. "Here goes." I muttered and pulled out of the driveway and onto the road.

It only took me forever to find the school and when I finally did, I knew I'd be late; I wondered into the front office and got my schedule from the lady at the desk, mumbled a thank you and walked out.

I got to my first class which was English of course, it all went well and when the bell rang I met a boy with black hair named Eric who agreed to show me to my next class which was government. Once that class was over I braved the weather and made it to my trig class alone. A couple classes later I found myself sitting in the cafeteria with a girl I had Trig and Spanish with.

I scoped out the other people in the room, my eyes landing on one table in particular, there were five people sitting at it. Two girls, on tall, very statuesque, a beautiful figure, long golden blonde hair that waved and flowed to the middle of her back. The other girl was small and pixie like, extremely thin with small features. Her hair was deep black cropped short and pointing in every direction.

Then there were three boys. A big muscular one with curly dark hair. Another one less bulky with untidy bronze hair, more boyish than the first. Then the last one was incredibly cute, he too was muscular but not as much, with honey blonde hair, he was taller, and leaner, and all around more gorgeous.

My eyes seemed to linger on this last boy, and like he felt me watching him his eyes snapped up to meet mine, quickly I looked down, but not quick enough to hide the deep red blush that formed on my features. I looked back up to see him smiling playfully at me. I breathed a sigh of relief. At least he was nice.

"Are you looking at the Cullen's?" Jessica Stanley asked me. She, I had met earlier that day, she didn't seem nice, but she didn't seem bad either.

"No." I lied quickly.

"Good I wouldn't bother, none of them date, and they all think they're too good for us anyway." Jessica huffed.

I looked back over to their table to see a larger smile spread across the blond boys face. He seemed like such a nice person. I smile in spite of myself at him and he grinned even wider. Sooner than I realized the bell rang, and everyone was filing out. I cannot believe that I spent the entire period gawking at him. I hurried to throw my trash away, and when I turned around everyone was already gone. I groaned and ran to my next class. It was music. I was so happy, I loved to sing.

The teacher seemed nice enough. And I was surprised to see the blond boy there when I arrive holding a guitar.

"Ah, that's right, Isabella Swan." The teacher said.

"Bella. Bella Swan." I choked.

"Bella, it says here that you're a singer, can you please demonstrate for us. You have nothing to worry about, we all support you." She said.

"That's great, don't worry, I'm not nervous." I said and stepped onto the platform, I had already brought in my music, I knew this was coming. I plopped my CD into the radio, and pressed play, before I knew it the music filled the room and my voice joined in.

"_Oh no I just keep on falling  
(Back to the same old…)  
Where's hope when misery comes crawling?  
(Oh my way, Ay…)  
With your faith you'll trigger a landslide  
(victory)  
Kill off this common sense of mind  
_

**My eyes met with the blonds and I felt myself go red, still he offered me a bright smile.**

_  
It takes acquired minds to taste, to taste, to taste this wine  
you can't down it with your eyes  
so we don't need the headlines  
we don't need the headlines  
we just want…  
_

**Everyone was now staring at me in shock, and amusement. Yeah that's right I rock. **

_  
Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?  
Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see  
Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?_

_Right now you're the only reason  
(I'm not letting go, oh…)  
Time out if everyone's worth pleasing  
(Well ha-ha!)  
You'll trigger a landslide  
(Victory)  
to kill off their finite state of mind_

_It takes acquired minds to taste, to taste, to taste this wine  
You can't down it with your eyes  
So we don't need the headlines  
No, we don't want your headlines  
We just want…_

_Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?  
Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see  
Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?_

_Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure?_

_Alright, so you think you're ready?  
Ok, then you say this with me  
Go!__  
We were born for this  
we were born for this  
Alright, so you think you're ready?  
OK, then you say this with me  
Go!  
We were born for this  
We were born for this  
We were born for this  
We were born for this_

_We were born for  
We were born for_

_Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure?  
Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see  
Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure now?_

_Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure?  
Tell me; tell me, can you feel the pressure?_

_We were born for this  
we were born for this  
we were born for this"_

When the song stopped my eyes met with the blonds once more before the teacher broke in.

'Isabella Swan that was amazing! I've never heard such potential in my entire life." She cooed. I blushed again. "I just have to figure out where to put you." The whole room erupted in begging and pleading, people wanting me to sing in the band. The teacher had already broken the class up into different bands. Just like me to be admitted late. "Oh! I almost forgot, you can join Mr. Cullen's band, they have no singer!" she practically shouted.

Slowly I walked over to the people standing around the blond boy. There was him, another boy with dark black hair sitting behind a set of drums, and another boy holding a guitar besides the blond boy, he had short red hair and a gorgeous face.

"I'm Chase Matthews." The boy behind the drums said, I walked up and shook his hand.

"I'm Conner Ryne." The other guitar player with the red hair said.

"And I'm Jasper Cullen." My knight breathed, and finally I knew his name, I reached out to shake his hand, but he grasped it tight and brought it up to his lips, and planted a soft kiss on the top of my hand.

"I'm Bella." I breathed, and he laughed.

"Oh, I know who you are." He said.

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REVIEW AND WELL ALL THAT JAZZY STUFF!!

_**Oh BTW Jasper is single, Emmett is with Rose, Alice is with Edward, weird I know. But I just love BxJ and no that's not for Jacob. Lol. **_

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**_Only you won't be seeing them until i get some major review-age. haha. _**

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	2. Get Over It

**RECAP!!**

"_And I'm Jasper Cullen." My knight breathed, and finally I knew his name, I reached out to shake his hand, but he grasped it tight and brought it up to his lips, and planted a soft kiss on the top of my hand._

"_I'm Bella." I breathed, and he laughed._

"_Oh, I know who you are." He said_.

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"You do?" I asked confused. He smiled at me crookedly.

"No, not really. Only things that I've heard."

"Oh." I breathed staring down at our hands.

"Oh, sorry." He said giving me an apologetic smile, and his eye twinkled, the edges crinkling.

The rest of the class went great I thought I'd have a chance to talk to Jasper more, but I think he was trying to stay away from me. I couldn't be that bad could I?

"Bella? Bella?" Someone was calling me, but I wasn't sure who until I heard it. "Miss. Swan?" It was the teacher.

"Sorry, was there something that you needed?" I asked confused.

"I'd like you sing one more song for us." She said her eyes holding a light.

"Anything I like?" I asked skeptically.

"Sure sure, anything you want." She said and waved her hand to the stage, which I climbed up on. I took my bad with my and pulled out my IPod and hooked it up to her computer. Then I scrolled till I found the song, I had taken the liberty of downloading some of the songs that I mixed onto it. I held my IPod in my hand waiting to press play. I walked up to the mic and grabbed it.

"Alright, so I don't know if this is necessary but this song is dedicated to someone who thought they'd play me." I said with a smile. Of course I was referring to my old boyfriend Landon who hadn't talked to me since I told him I was moving, the nerve.

Interest finally began to stir in the crowd and they came around the stage. Good, I live to perform. I pressed PLAY, and the music came.

"_Slipping down a slide  
I did enjoy the ride  
Don't know what to decide  
You lied to me  
You looked me in the eye  
It took me by surprise  
Now are you gratified  
You cried to me"_

**He was a liar.**

_"La, la, la, la, la_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of your face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it"_

**He left me and now he wants be back…too bad.**

_"When I was feeling down  
You'd start to hang around  
And then I found your hands all over me  
And that was out of bounds  
You filthy rotten hound  
It's badder than it sounds, believe me"_

**_He thought he always had a right to touch_ me because I was his. O how wrong he was.**

_La, la, la, la, la_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of your face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_Hey, you gotta get over it  
Hey, you gotta get over it_

_It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of your face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of your face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

**I was sick of his face I never wanted to see it again. But there was some small part of me that still cared, and that killed me. **

_You'll have to get over it"_

I opened my eyes and well…realized that I had closed them.

"That was amazing Bella, please take a seat." Mrs. Levinski motioned towards the area where my band had been sitting. I hopped from the stage and made my way over to the chair while everyone else was still gathered around the stage.

The first of my band-mates to make it back over was Chase who nodded and my direction and sat down at his drums. Then Conner the one with the red hair, he gave me a heartfelt smile and picked up his guitar.

Finally Jasper came back over and for a moment stood a few feet away just looking at me, before taking the final steps closer and taking me in his arms. It felt so right.

_Could I be falling for this guy?_ I asked myself, then he smiled at my confusion, and I had my answer. _Yes, yes I could be. _

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Review, i'm waiting, i think this one is worth 20 reviews. I won't upsate till i have 20 reviews in total. **


	3. Band Practice

**RECAP**

_Finally Jasper came back over and for a moment stood a few feet away just looking at me, before taking the final steps closer and taking me in his arms. It felt so right. _

Could I be falling for this guy?_ I asked myself, then he smiled at my confusion, and I had my answer. _Yes, yes I could be.

**

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BPOV

Okay, so music class was totally awesome! Japer was a nice enough person, even though that hug was a little awkward he was nice, and Chase and Conner were really nice guys too. But, I couldn't help but to see the piercing glares of other students…mostly girls.

"Bella, you were great today!" Chase said his black hair hanging in his eyes.

"Yeah, you rocked!" Conner said, smiling at me his blue eyes shining.

"Really?" I asked sincerely, twirling a piece of hair in my hand.

"The best." Jasper startled me by saying behind me.

"Thanks." I said blushing. I could have sworn I saw something pass through Jaspers eyes, something feral, but I must have been hallucinating from his hypnotic gaze, he was gorgeous after all.

Nevertheless he walked away, quite fast actually. Weird. I turned back to Chase and Conner.

"Yeah, it's sweet how you dedicated that song to your ex-boyfriend." Conner said. "Though I can't see how he'd ever let someone like you go, you are a catch." He said his eyes glinting. And I laughed, I actually laughed.

"There we go, now I can say I was responsible for your first laugh here at Forks!" Conner said proudly puffing out his chest.

"Well it is an honor, so you better stand behind that!" I laughed again.

"Oh, you bet I will." He said giving me a wicked smile. At that I had to laugh again. I could see myself liking this kid.

"Well where do I fit in?" Chase asked moving his guitar up on his side.

"You can be my knight." I said tapping him on the shoulder with one of Conner's drum sticks. He smiled brightly.

"Does this knight have shining armor?" He asked.

"No, just a regular knight!" I said.

He looked a little disappointed, but he'd live.

The bell rang and we all filed out, to our next classes, and I was on my way to Biology. When I got there, there was an obnoxious looking man with a weird face ushering me to an open seat next to some really good looking guy. I felt my breath catch in my throat. Well I guess he wasn't any better looking than Jasper. Jasper was r-e-a-l-l-y good looking.

"Hello" I greeted him. He just kind of looked at me sideways, not wanting to turn his head all the way, and sliding out further into the walkway. HOW RUDE! Jasper wouldn't do that.

All through class I saw him clenching his hand onto the edge of the desk in a death grip.

The bell finally rang, and I booked it out of class. Oh my god he was freaking scary! I ran into something hard upon exiting the classroom, and looked up to find Jasper.

"Hey Jazz." I said, and then blushed.

"Jazz?" he asked curiously, his golden eyes lighting up.

"Oh…do you not like Jazz? 'Cause I can just call you Jasper again it makes no difference to me." I said just rambling on. He reached out and touched my face, and I fell silent.

"I like Jazz." He said brushing my cheek with his fingers. I heard a growl, seriously, and I looked over to see the boy I sat next to in Biology looking at us with a death glare that even startled Jasper.

"Well…um I just wanted to tell you that we are having a band practice at Conner's house tonight." I said and went on my way, Edward really creeped me out.

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JPOV

I was walking to Biology class when her scent hit me, full on with so much power, then I felt her, she ran into me.

"Hey Jazz." She said then I felt a wave of embarrassment come off her with a mixture of happiness. I can't lie, she had such an impact on me, and her blood was such a beautiful smell.

"Jazz?" I asked, wow that was a cute name.

"Oh…do you not like Jazz? 'Cause I can call you Jasper again, it makes no difference to me." She said looking down at the ground. She was so beautiful; I reached my hand out slowly, as slowly as I could, and touched her warm, wonderful skin.

"I like Jazz." I whispered to her, brushing my fingers across her cheek, then I sensed him, and heard him, and felt him. Edward, his emotions were kicking up daggers at me. Anger. Disbelief. Jealously. Disgust. Sadness. It all hit me at once, and then I felt the most important one. Betrayal.

"Well…um I just wanted to tell you that we are having a band practice at Conner's house tonight." She said her eyes darting over to Edward several time before she left.

That was very startling to me, much more so then the other emotions. Quickly I uttered goodbye to Bella, and walked over to him,.

He was leaning against the cement wall, arms over his chest.

"We need to talk." I growled at him.

"Yes, yes we do." He agreed, he made no sense to me, how could he have been jealous over Bella? He had a mate.

"Maybe I'll invite Alice too, you know she loves a good chat." I said menace in my voice, he just glared and walked away.

Interesting, interesting.

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LPOV

When Bella left, she took my heart with her. In the whole world I wanted her, then she moved away so quickly. I loved her so much. I couldn't hurt her the way I did, I had to see her again. I talked to my parents, I might be able to go and live in Forks with my Aunt Lynn, but we'll have to wait and see how this turns out. I miss her too much.

"Landon! Come back to bed!" I heard Melony call. I looked over and saw her wrapping herself in one of the sheets from the bed.

_Soon._ I thought to myself. _Soon, I'd have my Bella back._ With those thoughts I let her drag me back over to the bed. What could it hurt to let her have what she wants? I slid down into the covers. _I'll only think of you Bella, I swear. _My Bella wasn't like this filthy person, my Bella was pure, she was an angel.

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BPOV

We had band practice at Conner's tonight, and it was awesome. I got to hang out with Jasper and the boys all night, and Conner's mother was the nicest person I'd ever met.

There were a couple times when I was left alone with Jasper and we'd talk and talk. We didn't really get much work done. We mostly used the night to get to know one another better.

I looked up and saw Chase was saying good-bye to Conner.

I walked over to him, and gave him a quick hug good-bye.

"See you tomorrow my knight." I said and we both dissolved into laughter. I found my eyes roaming across Conner's driveway and into the garage where we practiced, and landing on the old drum set that Chase had bought and brought over to Conner's house so that we could all practice together whenever we needed to at a moment's notice.

It was better because I couldn't imagine having to haul around a whole drum-set, and Conner's mom was cool with it.

"See you later, Bells." He said.

Then there were three. Conner had gone in the house as requested by his mother to do something for her. I yawned and walked over his yard and found myself laying in the grass.

"Comfy?" Jasper asked standing over me.

"Mmmhmmm." I said not able to form real words, this wasn't too good…I was tired…like really tired.

Jasper was looking at me nervously, and in an instant I felt myself become completely awake, like I'd just woken up refreshed. It was strange for a second, but it wasn't all that bad since I had to drive home.

"Where's Conner? Because I need to get home, but I wanted to stop somewhere first." I said getting anxious.

"Um…he said he'd be right out. Where else do you need to go? It's already pretty dark out." He said hesitant.

"That's why I need to go, and it's a secret." I said smiling.

"Sure." He said, and at that moment Conner slipped from his house, and made his way over to us.

"Well I think that I'm leaving Conner. I'll see you tomorrow." I said and gave him a big hug.

"Drive safely." He said.

"Have you seen my truck? I probably couldn't speed it I tried." I laughed.

"See you tomorrow Bella." Jasper said and I too, gave him a hug.

"See you…Jazz." I said and skipped off to my truck, it was time to go to my secret place, somewhere that I could relax, and I was so ready for that.

The night sky was gorgeous. I found a new hobby shortly after I moved here. I liked to drive out to this meadow at night, and just look at the stars, they were amazing. Brighter than any I've ever seen. It was easy to get lost in their general splendor, hard to focus on the splendor when you feel like you're being watched.

"What are you doing here?" I heard an icy voice ask. I looked up to see the boy I sat with in Biology today standing almost right next to me.

"N-nothing." I said scrambling from my sitting spot and walking back towards the woods it was a long walk anyway.

"You stay away from him." I heard him whisper. Confused I turned around.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Your little Jazzy." He said grabbing my wrist, and squeezing really tight. "You are not for him." He said. Then he gave my wrist another squeeze and pushed me back, I didn't stop, I kept running. I knew one thing for sure, this guy was dangerous, and he was threatening me.

But what was his tiff with Jasper? Either way I wasn't going to test him to find out.

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Hope you liked it, and I bet you can figure out what I changed in this one, if you can't…well I just may have to hit you.

**REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!**


	4. Explainations

**RECAP**

"_Your little Jazzy." He said grabbing my wrist, and squeezing really tight. "You are not for him." He said. Then he gave my wrist another squeeze and pushed me back, I didn't stop, I kept running. I knew one thing for sure, this guy was dangerous, and he was threatening me. _

_But what was his tiff with Jasper? Either way I wasn't going to test him to find out._

* * *

**BPOV**

"Good morning Bella!" I heard Jasper call from just behind me in the hallway, fighting back tears I ducked my head and continued walking.

_I'm sorry._ I thought

"Bella! Wait up!" he yelled cutting through all the people in front of him until he was directly behind me. Quickly I yanked the sleeved of my shirt down over my hand so that it would cover up the bruise that was left on my arm from Edward Cullen's grasp, that's the boy I sit next to in biology, I figured that out. I also figured out that that same Edward was Jaspers adopted brother. Oh, what luck I have.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he asked placing his hand on my back sending tingles up and down my spine. _No, no no. I couldn't be around him, not if I didn't want any trouble from Edward._

"Nothing." I managed to choke, even though it was a lie, wow, my first and hopefully last lie to Jasper Culled.

"Quit lying to me Bella." He snapped.

"I'm not." I said my voice cracking, and I ran off to my next class, I didn't look back but I'm sure he was just left standing there confused.

I found myself in lunch before I knew it, talking to Lauren, Jessica, Angela, Mike and Ben. That was until he walked up to my table.

"Bella, can I talk to you?" Jasper asked. I looked at him unsure for a moment, I knew if I did, if I talked to him right this moment that Edward would know.

"Um…we can talk…in music class." I said, and he nodded shortly heading back to his table.

"Why was Jasper talking to her?" I heard Jessica ask Lauren, who shrugged.

I heard Mike mutter something like, "Stupid Cullen." I found that ironic because the Cullen's seemed to be really smart.

I was dreading music, but again I wasn't because Jasper would be there, a time when Edward wouldn't know we talked, a time where I can be my old self again, and not be afraid.

Finally the time for music rolled around and I stalked off to the music room and was greeted by Chase and Conner's smiling faces. Chase did a little bow, something about a knight, and Conner laughed. I didn't get to laugh very much because I was pulled off in the other direction by Jasper, I guess he was making me talk.

"What's going on with you Bella?" Jasper asked running a hand through his blonde hair.

"It's nothing really Jasper…it's my problem…don't worry about it." I said patting him on the shoulder. Bad idea. In one instant he got an eyeful of the bruise on my arm and his eyes turned dark and livid.

"Where did that come from?" he asked.

"I fell." I said, trying to lie.

"Bella, stop lying, you suck at it, now tell me." He demanded. I wonder if the class was concerned about where we were, I mean we were in the instrument closet for heavens sake.

"It happened last night." I sighed.

"When…" He egged me on.

"I was at a meadow, and…you're not going to believe this…Edward showed up." I said, instantly recognition spread across his face, followed by anger.

"And what happened?" He asked through clenched teeth.

"I don't think I should tell you." I said warily looking at him concerned. He looked like he was about to snap.

"Just tell me Bella, I'll be fine, I can handle it. I'm a big boy now." He said trying to make me laugh, and failing.

"Well, when I saw that Edward was there I got up to leave, but he said something about me leaving someone alone, so I turned back around, I'm pretty sure that person was you, because you were the focal point of the rest of our lovely discussion." I laughed bitterly.

"He told me that I wasn't for you, and that I had to stay away from you, and as if to make his point he grabbed my wrist and squeezed it. As if that was necessary," I said dryly.

I swear again I heard Jasper growl, and then he lifted my hand in front of his face as if to observe it, then he gently dropped my hand back to my side, and then ever so lightly he kissed my forehead.

"I hope you don't always believe, and do what people tell you." He breathed his eyes wary, and worried, but full of another emotion that I couldn't place in the seconds that I looked into them, and then left the room. Things were indeed just getting interesting.

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Hope you liked it, not much was changed in this one, but I didn't see any need in changing it.

**REVIEW, I'M NOT PUTTING UP THE NEXT CHAPTER TILL I HAVE A NUMBER OF REVIEWS THAT I DEEM RESPECTABLE FOR ALREADY PREVIOUSLY HAVE OVER 200 REVIEWS FOR THIS STORY BEFORE. **

**Love me.**


	5. Shattered Windows

**RECAP**

"_I hope you don't always believe, and do what people tell you." He breathed his eyes wary, and worried, but full of another emotion that I couldn't place in the seconds that I looked into them, and then left the room. Things were indeed just getting interesting. _

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BPOV

"Bella, you better hurry up, or you'll be late!" Charlie called up the stairs. I was already ready, I just needed to run the brush through my hair one more time. I looked at myself in the mirror one last time, content on the outfit that I had chosen, a short denim skirt with a green tank top and a tan jacket, I looked good I thought, and I put on my favorite green flip flops for good measure.

"Tick-Tock, Tick-Tick Bella!" he yelled up.

"Alright, alright. Sheesh, I'm ready." I called to him, thudding down the stairs and swiping up my keys and book-bag on the way out the door.

"No breakfast?" He asked.

"No time!" I yelled closing the door.

I hopped in my baby, and put in the keys. The engine rumbled to life and I was off.

Ten minutes and I found myself at school, ten minutes and I found myself parking right next to the Cullen's, ten minutes and I was greeted with a smile and a glare.

"Hey Bell!" Jasper called from the other side of Edwards Volvo.

"Hey Jasper." I said closing the door to my truck. Edward was still poised by his door in-between my truck and his car, Jasper being on the other side. He looked at me as if to say '_go ahead and try to get to him, we'll see what happens.' _

Jasper smiled at me wickedly, and just shrugged his shoulders. He had told me not to worry about Edward, easy for him to say when he couldn't get killed by him!

"Something that you need?" The blonde girl asked wrapping her arm around the tall muscular boy.

"Uh…s-sorry." I said and picked up my speed walking away _How stupid do you have to be before you stand there in front of his whole family looking like an idiot? _I yelled at myself.

The only safe haven that I found all day besides lunch was music class, we hadn't begin our group band stuff yet. We were supposed to all pick a day to perform as a band this week, and I wasn't so sure as to when that day was. So I called dibs on the private work room for the period.

I turned on the mic, and popped my mix CD into the boom box. My favorite song began playing, _**He Wasn't**_ I loved that song.

"_There's not much going on today.  
I'm really bored, it's getting late.  
What happened to my Saturday?  
Monday's coming, the day I hate._

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.  
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.  
He wouldn't even open up the door.  
He never made me feel like I was special.  
He isn't really what I'm looking for."

**You know what? Screw my Ex we were over anyway, and he put me through too much pain to care about him anymore. Whatever. **

"This is when I start to bite my nails.  
And clean my room when all else fails.  
I think it's time for me to bail.  
This point of view is getting stale.

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.  
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.  
He wouldn't even open up the door.  
He never made me feel like I was special.  
He isn't really what I'm looking for.

Na na na na na, we've all got choices.  
Na na na na, we've all got voices.  
Na na na na na, stand up make some noise.  
Na na na na, stand up make some noise.

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.  
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.  
He wouldn't even open up the door.  
He never made me feel like I was special.  
He isn't really what I'm looking for.  
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.  
He wouldn't even open up the door.  
He never made me feel like I was special.  
Like I was special, cuz I was special.

Na na na na na."

**I didn't need to think about my Ex anymore, we were over, I didn't need him. We were completely over. I would never take him back anyway. This is ridiculous. **

I sat the mic down, I needed a minute, I loved this song even if I didn't write it, it was amazing, it was basically like the mantra of my heart. Things in my life haven't exactly been easy lately, no one understood anything right now, and the only person that I think could, well I was forbidden from talking to him wasn't I?

I wasn't too sure where I was going to go from here, I set the mic down on the top of the piano that was in the room and walked over to the window. IT looked normal outside happy, I noticed that a group of Biology students were outside, I guess we were going out there today, they seemed to be working in pairs…great. I could already see Mike's overanxious face in my mind.

I sighed and pressed the next button on the stereo, waiting for the music to start. I let my mind wander over the things that were going on, the things with Edward, my feelings for Chase that were creeping up out of no where, Landon forever begin there in my thoughts. There was Jasper whom I know I could love, if only I'd be able to be with him.

My fist slammed down on the piano causing it to make noises.

Then my phone started going off, quickly before the sound reached the other room I answered it.

"Hello?" I whispered into the phone.

'Bella?" I heard the voice ask. How could that even be possible, It was Landon.

"Yeah. Hey, Landon it's me." I said feeling completely awkward.

"I have some good news." He said.

"Yeah?" I asked. I heard the song finally switch over, and the music started.

"_Well it's on my mind,  
I'm heading back in time  
and when I think of all the…"_

Quickly I clicked pause.

"Is that our song?" He asked confused. Crap, I forgot that this was the song that Landon had given me. Damn damn damn.

"Uh, yeah, here I'll turn it off."

"No!" he said. "I mean…let it play, it's been so long since we listened to it together." He said. My hand fell away from

"Oh, ok." I said and click play again, letting it pick up where it left off.

"…_songs we used to play and then  
I think of you and it's alright.  
I think of you and it's alright._

Well it's this sort of thing that  
gets me to lose my mind  
and it's the flash, flashy eyes that  
make it worthwhile.  
Everytime when we, we get together  
we just fall in love again.

All in all it's the perfect scene  
and there's not anywhere that  
I would rather be and it's now,  
now or never when we're chasing  
our dreams, and Oh. We're getting close now  
don't turn away!

It's on my mind I've got, I've got it all  
and I wanted you to come inside. It only  
takes just a second when you understand  
you're out of time. It only takes just a second  
when you understand you're out of time.

All in all it's the perfect scene  
and there's not anywhere that  
I would rather be and it's now,  
now or never when we're chasing  
our dreams, and Oh. We're getting close  
now don't turn away!

Don't turn away! Oh you know its the perfect scene and its not anywhere id raller be .

Oh where getting close now dont turn away"

"I love listening to that song with you." He said after a moment.

"Yeah." I said.

"Why are you playing it?" He asked

"Band class, like I mean literally a _band_ there are three other members in my band, I'm the lead singer. Each band is supposed to have a back up, but there's only me." I said sourly.

"Oh, well I originally called because I have a surprise for you." He said bashfully.

"Oh, what?" I asked confused, what could he possibly surprise me with?

"Close your eyes, and don't turn around." I heard him say. Even though he couldn't see me I did, I'm a bad liar and if he asked if I did, I doubt I could lie to him without him knowing.

"Ok." I said. But the phone was dead.

"Damn." I muttered, I went to turn around when I felt two arms snake around my waist.

"I told you not to turn around." He whispered in my ear.

"Landon?" I said confused.

I felt a kiss on my neck, and I shivered.

"Why are you here?" I asked confused. Another kiss was placed on my neck.

"I missed you, I'm living with my aunt, I started school here today, I couldn't stand being away from you any longer." He said.

"Yeah, but Landon, we broke up, okay? I mean that's what you said, we're over." I said pulling away from his grasp, and turning to face him.

My breath left me, he was still gorgeous. Light brown hair, bright blue beautiful eyes, and that preppy boy look that everyone loved. He was too perfect.

"I came here so that we could be together, Bella. The distance was the only thing keeping us apart." He said taking my hand. Which I brushed his away.

"I need time." I said.

"I'll give you some time, but please remember that I love you." He said and so fast that I couldn't stop it, he planted his lips on mine, when he pulled away he licked his lips, and kissed my hand.

Out of no where the window to the Sound Room shattered, and I jumped.

"Sorry, I have to get back to class." I said and booted it out of there.

**

* * *

**

JPOV

I didn't like the fact that he was in there with her, not one bit. So I stood outside the Sound Room waiting to see if she would need my help.

"Why are you here?" She asked.

Silence.

"I missed you, I'm living with my aunt. I stared school here today, I couldn't stand being away from you." He finally said.

"Yeah, but Landon, we broke up, okay? I mean that's what you said, we're over." That's my girl, way to be assertive.

Silence.

"I came here so that we could be together, Bella. The distance was the only thing keeping up apart." He said.

More Silence.

"I need time." I heard her whisper.

"I'll give you some time, but please remember that I love you."

I didn't hear anything after that, so I stole a peek through the window of the room, and saw them kissing, he was kissing her, that much I would see, she was digging her nails into his arms, finally he stopped and kissed her hand.

_Dammit! Why was I so jealous of this creep? Did I really have feelings for this human?_ In that brief moment of weakness my hand shot up involuntarily and shattered the window, in a motion that I wanted to be a quick knock on the door, and I booted out of there.

I was way more unstable than I thought.

**

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**

So?? So?? Do you like? I know I hate Landon too!

**REVIEW OR YOU SHALL DIE**

**Just kidding!! **

**But really Review**


	6. Accidents & Heros

**BPOV**

Why was he back? I left all that behind me, I thought that I left that behind me; I was hoping that I did. I couldn't even think walking to my next few classes, I couldn't think when I got in my truck, and I sure as hell couldn't think when I saw that deer run out in front of my truck.

I cranked the steering wheel completely to the left, hoping to give the deer enough time to evade its doom; sure enough the deer skipped back into the woods within seconds, my truck still sliding across the barren back roads of this town. I wondered if I crashed, how long would it take to find me? Would they simply just regard my absence as an after school thing, not a life threatening car crash thing?

My tires screeched and my car lurched sideways.

_Oh, so this is how it's going to go, I'm going to flip._

I threw my hands up onto my face in desperation knowing that no amount of wheel spinning was going to help me now.

The car wasn't really going fast, I had been warned by a friend not to take it over sixty, but I'm sure that that would be enough to squish me to the road.

But my car just stopped, I thought it was over but unfortunately it wasn't. The immediate stop was enough opposite force to throw me out of the truck. The windshield shattered, and I felt the hardness of hitting the hood of my car. Then the sting of the pavement tearing at my flesh, then after a moment I felt the warmth of what could only be my blood pooling around my head and through my hair.

_Great, just great, I didn't even make Charlie dinner. _

I don't know how long I lay there, long enough for the surrounding woods to get a little darker I guess. Long enough for the animals to come out. I wondered how long I would last, to any predator of decent size I'd be an easy meal, already half dead on the ground, and defenseless. I heard a loud snarl echo through the woods. _Wow, already huh?_ I could feel myself drifting off into unconsciousness, faster and faster until everything turned black.

* * *

When I opened my eyes I found light, I was in a bed. Thank heavens, this probably meant that someone found me and that I was safe, I was probably in a hospital, or maybe if I was lucky at home, I hate hospitals.

"Dad?" I whispered, I knew that he would have to be around here somewhere.

"What did she just say?" I heard a voice ask. Good, I wasn't alone.

"Dad?" I said louder, twitching my fingers.

"She's asking for her father." A female voice said sadly.

"What did you say happened again?" A calm voice asked.

"While I was…I found her…in a car accident…blood was everywhere, her truck doesn't look too bad, just a shattered wind shield. It looked like a stump stopped her car and ejected her from her seat." I knew that voice, but what was it doing here with me.

"It's her own fault for not wearing a seat belt." I heard a voice that I hated say.

Something growled a rumbling loud noise that filed my ears. It was then that the pain hit me. My head throbbed, my arms stung, my legs were sore, and my chest felt like it would explode.

I couldn't really bring myself to scream out in pain, not in front of these people.

In the end I just let a few tears slide down my face and onto the pillow that I was sure was under my head.

The conversation went on.

"How did you manage to get her back here, I don't mean to undermine you, but we all know that you don't have the best control, yet with so much blood you managed to bring her back here safely?" That calm voice asked.

"I don't really understand it myself, at the time all I could do was think 'not her, not now, not like this'. I don't know what it was that made me want to save her, I just couldn't let her lay there and die, and I'd never forgive myself if I was the cause of her death, even with blood like hers that calls to me, I'd never be able to hurt her." He said.

"I think she's coming to." The other calm male voice said.

I felt a hand lift my wrist, and the poke of a needle into my arm. Then I was drifting again.

* * *

This time when I came back to I was certain that I would stay that way, I wouldn't left them put me back under, I needed to know what was going on. I had to figure this out.

A hand that I hadn't realized that was there let my hand go. It made sense that I hadn't realized that it was there though, I felt to drugged out right now, I could barely see right, I mean right now all I can see is something that resembles that outlining shadow of Jasper Cullen. Crazy right?

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?" The voice asked, weird that voice sounded like Jasper's too. The room did a little spin, even though I wasn't moving, and my eyes started to focus in on things. I bright white ceiling, red painted walls, I was in a large comfy bed…then I saw Jasper.

This in no way was a hospital. Why was he here? Where was here? Where was my dad? I groaned, I was still in so much pain.

"Bella?" he asked again, I saw his figure move, he was now hovering over me.

"Yeah…" I said groggily.

"Bella what hurts?" he asked.

"Everything." I groaned.

"Bella do you remember what happened?" he asked worridly.

"Stupid deer…my car…Charlie…my dad…" I couldn't get out a complete sentence.

"It was a deer?" I asked slowly.

'In my way. Swerved to miss it." I nodded.

"Who's Charlie?" He asked.

"My dad…where is my dad?" I asked, he must be so worried. I felt bad.

"He's here Bella, downstairs waiting for you to wake up," He said, and my eyes finally adjusted, and I could see all of his beauty right above my face.

"Jasper…it hurts so much." I complained tears falling from my eyes.

"I know Bella, I know. I'll go get the doctor…my father…he'll give you something to take to pain away." Jasper said getting up.

"No!" I yelled and my hand shot out to take his. "Please I don't want to go back to sleep again."

His eyes seemed to be calculating something, he almost sat back down, but he didn't.

"You're in too much pain, you need to sleep." He said letting my hand go.

"Please Jasper…please." I begged. His eyes flashed once, then softened, I think I won.

"You're boyfriend Landon is here. Downstairs with you father." He said, and then left the room.

"He's not my…" But Jasper was gone,

_There goes Landon again, always screwing me over. _I thought. More people walked into the room, a few, one of them was Landon himself, obviously Jasper had told them I woke up.

"Bella, honey are you alright?" My dad asked taking my hand.

"Yeah dad, I'm fine." I said lamely.

"I've told you a hundred timed Bella, the deer here are overpopulated, you could have hit it, you didn't need to swerve." My dad said.

"Yeah I did dad, I can't just kill it because it will help me out." I said.

Jasper and his siblings eyes glazed over with some emotion that I had never seen before. I wonder what their deal was.

"Bella, baby are you alright?" Landon asked looking concerned.

"Don't talk to me. I hate you." I snapped.

He chuckled.

"It's not funny you loser." I growled.

"Bella, be nice to your boyfriend." My dad scolded me. I felt my eye twitch.

"He's not my boyfriend dad." I said looking Landon straight in his bemused face.

"Yet." Landon said his eyes lighting up.

"Ever." I mumbled, and he laughed. "I'm not seeing the funny here." I said.

"Bella, I'm Carlisle, Jasper, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Alice's father, I'm a doctor, would you mind answering a couple questions for me?" he asked.

"Sure. But only if you can answer a few from me." I said.

"Alright but I go first. What hurts?"

"Not really much now, it was worse a little bit ago." I said.

"Is your vision alright?" He asked.

'Twenty Twenty doc." I replied.

"How about your head, any dizziness?"

"Nope, none." I said. "My turn." I said and he smiled.

"Why am I here?"

"My son, Jasper was driving home, and found you, the accident, thought it would be best to bring you to a doctor." He smiled, and I frowned.

"Where is here?" I asked.

"Our house, I wasn't at the hospital at the time, and he thought you needed immediate attention." Carlisle said.

"Ok, one more. Can I go home now?" I asked.

"Once you can walk…" Carlisle started to say and I didn't need to hear anymore, I swung my legs around and plopped them onto the floor, taking a few shaky steps before I was able to really walk.

I grabbed Charlie's hand and pulled him with me.

"Bye!" I yelled.

"Make sure you take it easy!" Carlisle yelled from the room.

"Okay and thanks!" I yelled back.

I really needed to be away from Landon.

**

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**

Ok so review, not much was changed in this one, I thought that it was pretty perfect so far. REVIEW

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	7. When She Cries

**Sorry for the wait so here it is. BTW I don't own twilight or these songs. **

* * *

"You sure were in a hurry to get out of there Bells." My dad said as we climbed into the truck.

"Yeah…well, you trying being stalked by that creeper Landon then we'll see how you fair." I retorted.

"The boy looks nice enough, if not harmless Bella, why can't you just give him another chance?" He asked me looking my direction.

"_Another?"_ I asked confused.

"It was a long wait for you to wake up, we got to talking, I think it means a lot that he moved out here to be with you."

"Wow, thoughts." I said uninterested.

"Just think about it Bells." He was silent. "We're going to have to do something until your car is fixed." He said almost to himself.

"I can just take the bus dad, no big deal." I promised.

"No, no, no that won't do. You'll need something to drive around town, and I don't think you'd want to hitch a ride and a squad car." He said with a smile.

"So what are we going to do?" I asked tiredly.

"Well, I thought I'd go talk to Billy." My dad said.

"Billy, as in Billy Black? Rachel and Rebecca's father?"

"And Jacob's, you remember him don't you?" he asked looking over at me.

"Wow! I forgot about Jake! It was soooo long ago, wow I bet he's taller than me!" I said enthusiastically.

"Yeah all those La Push kids sprouted up like weeds, all too damn tall for their own good." He muttered.

"Really? I'd love to go and see him, it's been so long." I pouted.

"Go over and see Jake…on the list, maybe we could stop over early tomorrow morning, you can miss an hour of school, I'll call you in for a rainy day, well half a day you're still going, a police chiefs daughter can not be a truant." He smiled.

"Of course not, so it's a deal." I said, and smiled at him.

"So be up and ready tomorrow!" He said as we pulled into our driveway.

He got out of the car and started to fumble with the keys.

"Wait, what time?" I yelled fumbling with my seat belt.

"Well Billy leaves the house at six in the morning on Fridays to fish, so I'd say be ready to go around five." He said pushing the door open.

"Please dad, not that early…I'll die!" I yelled.

"You're so dramatic." He laughed plopping down into the recliner.

"I mean it! I'd die of sleep deprivation.

"Maybe you should go to bed now then?" he asked.

It was already nine, so I obliged.

I crawled out of bed at a ridiculous hour only to walk into the Black's house and be tackled by a large man with dark skin and black hair.

"Um…Hi?" I said.

"Come on Bell, it's me, Jake!" he said smiling at me.

I had to look closer at his face, this looked like a totally different person, but this was Jake.

"Jake?!" I squealed jumping on him and giving him another hug, that didn't seem to bother him. "Where are your sisters" I asked, then I remembered even more than him.

"Moved out, away, bigger and better things." He said with a tone of remorse in his voice.

"Ah, well that's disappointing." I said.

"But they call and stuff, we can talk to them a lot, they're supposed to be coming down sometime to visit."

"Sometime soon I hope, I'd love to see them." I gushed.

"Yeah, me too." He smiled, and I had to look at him closely again, he was completely different.

"What are you staring at? Something in my teeth?" He asked, closing his mouth just in case.

"No, you just look so different." I breathed.

"I hope that's in a good way, otherwise I think I might be a little worried." He said and I smiled.

"Oh, you have nothing to worry about." I promised.

"So what have you been up to? I know you just moved here, I hope you've been able to get used to hoe things are, it's still really old fashioned." He laughed.

"Yeah, it is." I agreed.

Before I realized he swept me up into another strong and forceful hug.

"Ugh, Jake! I can barely breathe!" I complained.

"Oh, sorry, I just missed you so much Bell!" He exclaimed letting me go.

"I missed you too Jake." This time, something lit in his eyes, like a realization. Something that he hadn't noticed before.

"Who have you made friends with so far? Anyone that I'd know?" he asked.

"Umm, I don't really know, there's Mike Newton, Jessica Stanley, Angela Weber, Jasper Cullen, I know he has siblings too, but I don't talk to the other ones much, um…Landon's here, but I'll tell you about that later, he's hardly a friend. I'd like to freaking behead him and put him six feet under if you know what I mean." I said.

"Yeah…so who is this Landon creep you so wish was dead?" he asked.

"Come on, lets go for a walk and I'll tell you." I said.

* * *

So for the next hour and a half we walked around Jake's property and I told him about my sob story and being followed by my creepy and rude Ex. He seemed a little less intrigued, which irked me, still I guess I couldn't hope for him to be too…I don't even know what I'd want him to be.

"So you made friends with the Cullen's?" He asked after a while.

"Just the one, Jasper, he seems really nice. The other one, um, what's his name…Edward…now he's freaking scary!" I shuddered.

"Why is he so scary?" Jake asked his voice different.

"He threatened me! I mean really who even does that anymore?" I asked.

"He…threatened…you?" He asked getting angry.

"Yeah, but don't worry about it Jake, I'll deal with him." I said.

"No-Bell, don't-"

"Bella! Let's go, I want to get you to school! I can't have them thinking the police chiefs daughter is a truant!" Charlie yelled for me.

"Bye Jake!" I said running back to the house. "and don't worry about me, I can handle myself!" I promised.

"That's not what I-!" But I couldn't hear him anymore, even if he was following me, I had made it all the way to Billy's police cruiser and was already buckling my seat belt.

"So dad did Billy have any idea of where I can find a car?" I asked.

"Yeah, actually he said he found, well more likely Jake found it, a red Mitsubishi Eclipse GT, it's been used, but it's in excellent shape. One of Jake's school friends had it for a while but he got a speeding ticket so his parents are making him sell it, so I thought that that would be a great car for you. I think I'm going to go by and pick it up tonight." Charlie said, then he handed me a piece of paper, it was a picture. IT was a picture of the car, it was glossy red and beautiful with a black hood, it was amazing, I couldn't wait to drive it.

"But I'm trusting you to obey the speeding laws." Charlie said.

"Of course I will dad!" I squealed.

"Alright, hop out, I need to get to work." He said, I hadn't even realized that we were at school yet.

"Alright dad, I'll see you later tonight." I cooed.

I went straight to the office, apologized for bring late, they ended up calling Charlie's cell phone, then they were really sorry. I skipped off to class, it was already time for Music class. I couldn't wait.

When I opened the door another band was performing and so I quietly made my way over to where my bandmates were standing, confined in a corner really uninterested in everything that was going on.

"Oh thank god you're here Bella!" Conner breathed when I reached them.

"Why, what's going on?" I asked.

"Pop quiz! Well performance." Chase said.

"Oh, sorry!" I said. "Are we still able to perform?" I asked.

"Yeah, thank goodness." Conner said.

"Where were you?" Jasper asked slowly.

"I had to stop by a friends' house this morning, we kind of lost track of time, and well I guess you can see I'm late." I said.

"A friends' house?" He asked looking at me strangely.

"Yeah, the Black's house, I don't think you'd know them Jacob's younger." I said.

"Ok Bella, no offense, but we really don't care what you did this morning, we need to figure out what song we're doing and quick!" Chase said.

"Alright, well we have a couple songs we haven't done for them yet, how about we do Pocket Full of Sunshine, I mean we all know that one pretty well." I said.

"No way, I am so not in the mood for that music." Chase said, and Conner and Jasper nodded.

"But there's only a few songs that we all know that parts to!" I contradicted.

"Well, pick another one." Chase said, clearly annoyed.

"Fine. Ok, we'll do _When She Cries_, and that's my last piece of input." I said.

"I'm okay with that one." Chase said.

"Me too." Conner said.

"Fine by me." Jasper nodded, and before we knew it, it was our time up.

"Alright, whenever you're ready." The teacher said. I nodded and climbed onto the stage. I was half elated to see Landon standing down in the crowd. He needed to hear this.

The music picked up, and I started to sing.

"_Little girl terrified  
She'd leave her room if only bruises would heal  
A home is no place to hide  
Her heart is breaking from the pain that she feels_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries?_

_Today she's turning sixteen  
Everyone's singing, but she can't seem to smile  
They never get past arms length  
How could they act like everything is alright?  
Pulling down her long sleeves  
To cover all the memories the scars leave  
She says" maybe making me bleed will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries?_

_This is the dark before the dawn  
The storm before the peace  
Don't be afraid because seasons change and  
God is watching over you  
He hears you_

_Every day's the same  
She fights to find her way  
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray  
She'll be just fine, cause I know He hears her when she cries..."_

The music ended and I was soooo ready to just get off the stage, I really had no desire or connection to that song. It had no connection with my life, it was just what we call a crowd wower. It made the crowed feel sad and give sympathy. Which was why I wasn't expecting such a large reaction to it when the crowd began cheering, the teacher nodded, signifying that we needed to do another song.

**Rule #1: Always Give the Crowd What it Wants.**

Everyone looked to me, we had already been having troubles picking out the first song, so I mouthed to them the next song, one I knew that they'd all agree to no matter what, and the music picked up again.

"_Out of sight  
Out of mind  
Out of time  
To decide_

_Do we run?  
Should I hide?  
For the rest  
Of my life_

_Can we fly?  
Do I stay?  
We could lose  
We could fail_

_In the moment  
It takes  
To make plans  
Or mistakes_

_30 minutes, a blink of an eye  
30 minutes, to alter our lives  
30 minutes, to make up my mind  
30 minutes, to finally decide_

_30 minutes, to whisper your name  
30 minutes, to shoulder the blame  
30 minutes, of bliss, thirty lies  
30 minutes, to finally decide"_

**I snuck a look at the audience and they were loving it, or so they appeared to be. The teacher was tapping her foot, and I saw Jessica scowl with jealousy. I smiled. **

"_Carousels  
In the sky  
That we shape  
With our eyes_

_Under shade  
Silhouettes  
Casting shade  
Crying rain_

_Can we fly?  
Do I stay?  
We could lose  
We could fail_

_Either way  
Options change  
Chances fail  
Trains derail_

_30 minutes, a blink of an eye  
30 minutes, to alter our lives  
30 minutes, to make up my mind  
30 minutes, to finally decide_

_30 minutes, to whisper your name  
30 minutes, to shoulder the blame  
30 minutes, of bliss, thirty lies  
30 minutes, to finally decide_

_To decide  
To decide, to decide, to decide_

_To decide  
To decide, to decide, to decide_

_To decide"_

That was a good one too, I loved that song, and when I looked back out at the crowd they almost all wore shocked expressoins. Obviously they didn't know I could sing like that, well they did now.

I looked back and smiled at the band mates, shooting Conner a thumbs up, which he returned.

In any event we were done, even if they wanted more, all we ever had to do was one encore.

"Very good." Mrs. Levinski said.

"Thanks." I said then hopped off the stage, but my clumsiness got the best of me, and I slipped.

I felt myself falling, but I was caught in someones arms. I looked up to see a grinning Landon.

"Don't touch me!" I shrieked.

"Jeez Isabells, calm down." He said shaking his head, and letting me go.

"It's Bella you idiot!" I said tears in my eyes as I ran to the Sound Room, I needed to sing, something. Anything. Or maybe I just needed to out of the same room as Landon, and not breathing the same air as him. That was probably it.

I was so confused about Landon, and Jasper…and I hate to say it…Edward too. I threw to Sound Room doors open, then the sound of the music hit me. Someone was already in here.

It was Edward…on the piano. Things couldn't get much weirder. He was good too!!

"Oh! Sorry!" I said when he turned to look at me. I was surprised to see a little less hate.

"Do you need to room? I mean you are actually in this class unlike me." He said.

"I did, but it can wait." I said my voice and hands trembling, I hated to admit it, but he still scared me…a lot.

I think he noticed because he got up and walked towards me.

"I'm sorry for my behavior recently, that's unforgivable." He said reaching his hand out to me in truce.

I took it and shook it.

"No problem, even though I still don't really understand, but that's okay." He wasn't really listening anymore. Strange. He was just staring at me with a vacant and a somehow unsatified expression. Like there was something more that he was expecting to get out of my reaction… (_**or thoughts**_** sorry had to throw it in there)**

I walked over to the boom box, dropped in my CD and flipped through the songs, until landing on the one I wanted. It was mostly Piano. But the sound was all defected, something must have happened while I was burning the song.

I cursed, I really wanted to sing this song. I mean I had the sheet music, but I couldn't play piano. The only reason that I carried it was so that when I tried to re-make the song so the our band didn't need to use the piano, we'd have something to base the music off of.

"What's wrong?"Edward asked.

"Stupid CD is a piece of crap." I said. "That's what I get for trying to download a song that's mostly piano." I laughed.

"Do you have to sheet music?" He asked.

"Yeah, I do." I said.

"Let me see them." He said holding out his hand. I turned around and dug through my backpack until I found them, and gave them to him, his oddly cold hand brushing mine.

He set them on the piano, and gestured to me, as if to say, 'whenever your ready.' I nodded and he began playing. It took me a moment to get over the beauty of his playing before I could sing, but I managed to get the first line out.

"_Waking up I see that everything is ok  
The first time in my life and now it's so great  
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed  
I think about the little things that make life great  
I wouldn't change a thing about it  
This is the best feeling  
_

**I started tearing up, I couldn't help it, and Edward looked at me like I was crazy. **

_  
This innocence is brilliant, I hope that it will stay  
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now  
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by  
_

**I did, I had let it pass me by. More tears. **

_  
I found a place so safe, not a single tear  
The first time in my life and now it's so clear  
Feel calm I belong, I'm so happy here  
It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere  
I wouldn't change a thing about it  
This is the best feeling_

_This innocence is brilliant, I hope that it will stay  
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now  
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by_

_It's the state of bliss you think you're dreaming  
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling  
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry_

_It's the state of bliss you think you're dreaming  
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling  
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry_

_It's so beautiful it makes you want to cry_

_This innocence is brilliant, it makes you want to cry  
This innocence is brilliance, please don't go away  
Cause I need you now  
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by_

_This innocence is brilliant, I hope that it will stay  
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now"_

When the song was over I was gasping for air, it was such a sad song, and I knew it always made me cry, I had no idea why I had even allowed myself to sing it in front of Edward. What surprised me most was when Edward took me in his arms and held me. Quieting my tears.

"You have a beautiful voice." He said.

How strange this day was turning out to be.

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Thanks for being patient with me for soooo long, I know some of you have wished that I would just write. But here it is, a new and long chapter just for you since I made you wait, but don't think I forgot about the 10 review thing to update, make sure you update for the next chapter. And for all of those readers out there that also read my other three stories

**THANKS AGAIN**

**NOW REVIEW!! **


	8. What Happened

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READ AND REVIEW…so we find ourselves in a very awkward situation in this update.

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"Did you talk to Edward yesterday?" Jasper asked in music class the next day.

"Why?" I asked wary of his question, had Edward said something?

"No reason, he's just been…_happy, _recently, and that's a little odd, and when I asked him about it…well he ignored me." He laughed.

"Why would he ignore you? Are you two fighting or something?" I asked concerned, I'd never really seen Jasper mad, but I'd seen Edward mad, and if one was like the other I never wanted to.

"I'm not sure if we're fighting or not anymore, he's up and down all the time. He just seems so off lately. I don't know how to explain it." He said shaking his head his topaz eyes narrowed in frustration and confusion.

"Well I did see him yesterday in the Sound Room, he was already in there playing when I walked in, but that was about it. Oh, and he listened to me sing a song, but then he left." I said. "I'm not sure anything would have happened to change his mood that much. He hates me anyway." I cast my eyes to the ground, and I felt Jaspers hand under my chin pulling my face back up to meet his, and immediately I was lost in his beautiful eyes.

"It's his loss if he hates you." Jasper said, then his face moved closer to mine, and my breath stopped in my throat, I almost choked on it, I breathed in his sweet scent, but he never came any closer, he sighed, and backed off.

I won't lie when I say that the situation after that, for the next several minutes was quite awkward. Jasper was messing with his guitar with Conner who also played guitar. Chase was sitting down at the drums looking annoyed. We didn't get to perform today since we did yesterday, we were watching the rest of the bands pass their tests, and get judged.

"Ok class, I know it's kind of strange but we have more additions to our group, Edward Cullen, and seeing how Bella's group only has one singer he'll go there. As long as that's fine with you, Bella." Mrs. Levinski said, peeking over her glasses.

"Oh, well that's fine Mrs. L, I don't mind." I said honestly, maybe I wouldn't have to sing so much anymore.

"We have one more, um…Landon Ryan. Right?" She asked someone I couldn't see so I peeked around Jasper. And there stood Landon, yup creepy stalker Landon.

"Yeah, that's me." He said giving her a smile that would have melted anyone's heart.

"Well, all the bands have equal amounts of members, so you can just pick." Mrs. Levinski said.

His eyes darted over to me, and Jasper stepped in-between my vision of him. It looked like Landon was opening his mouth to say something, but then Jessica broke in.

"He can be in our group Mrs. Levinski, since we have no guys." Jessica said, and I silently thanked her, even though I hated her. She was right. There were no guys in her band, just her, Lauren, Angela, and Ekko, who was kind of gothic but way cool, I liked her.

"There you go Landon, enjoy." Mrs. L said.

He nodded and glanced in my direction a wicked smile on his face, and I stopped breathing, I was so scared, I could feel the tears forming in my eyes.

Then I felt a cold hand take my hand, and I looked up to see Jasper looking down at me with an emotion that I wasn't sure of on his face.

Then I felt another presence on the other side of me, and turned my head to see Edward glaring at Jasper, he didn't look too happy now. A feeling of confusion, and anger swept over me, so much so that my legs began to wobble, and got lightheaded. It was so bad that I started falling backward, but I landed in someone's arms. I had squeezed my eyes shut from the expected impact, and when I opened them to see Edwards face…well I was pretty shocked.

"Thank…you." I said, as he helped me stand up.

"Don't worry, it wasn't _your _fault." He said looking at Jasper, and I felt that I was missing something.

"Are you alright?" Jasper asked grabbing my arms.

"Yeah Jazzy, I'm fine." I said my voice weak.

His eyes narrowed and he scrutinized my face.

"I don't believe you." He said.

"Trust me, I'll be fine, just give me a moment." I said with a smile, and went to sit on the ground next to the drum-set the Chase was sitting at, I remembered that Chase had seemed down, and it was a perfect excuse to get out of that awkward situation.

"Are you alright?" I asked him, and his red head shot up, his pretty blue eyes tuning in on my brown.

"Um…" His face inched back down, and I scooted closer to him, and took his hand.

"You can tell me Chase." I whispered. I saw his eyes focus in on our locked hands, and I was amazed when he put his other hand on top of mine. So I took my last free hand and added it on top of his, and we both laughed.

He looked back up at me, a crooked smile on his face, but I could see the tears that threatened to fall.

"You can tell me." I whispered again.

He nodded and looked back down.

"It's…it's my mom…she…she has cancer. We had been waiting for her results for a while now….but now it's official." He said.

"But they have treatments now, she'll be alright-" he was already shaking his head at my words.

"They...they said that maybe if it had been a little sooner…if it wasn't in the late stages…" I felt a tear his my hand, and I couldn't stop myself, I was overwhelmed in grief, and sorrow, I dropped his hands, and gathered him into my arms, and let him cry on my shoulder.

"You'll be alright." I whispered. "I'll be right here." I promised. I could feel him nod.

"Thank you Bella, that means so much to me." He said, and he let me go.

"I'll be here if you ever need someone to talk to."

"I might just take you up on that." He said wiping his eyes.

"So how long…did they…uh." I wasn't sure exactly how to ask him how long his mother had left to live.

"They said, about a month…maybe less. They put her in a nice room, she's on medication so she can't feel the pain, she's refused any painful treatments. She wants to go peacefully." He said, and I nodded.

"I'm so sorry Chase." I said, and he didn't overlook the fact that I was crying too now, tears rolling down my face.

"Come on Bella, don't cry…I…I wouldn't know what to do if…" He trailed off, and I tried to compose myself.

"I'm sorry, at least she…she's not in pain anymore." I said.

"She used to be in soooo much pain, headaches, she could barely walk, it was horrible, I just can believe that those headaches and that pain are going to be the most recent feelings she remembers."

"Yeah, but you said that she can't feel that anymore."

He just shook his head.

"Sometimes she forgets to take her medication, and I'll walk in the room and she'll be in such pain, I don't know what to do, I pray every night, but I know it's not going to help."

I felt my chest swelling with emotion, and I started crying again. He didn't tell my to stop, he too had tears coming down his face.

"I just don't understand…how God could ever take such a kind hearted person, she was so happy, so pure." He said his voice breaking on the last word.

I could feel this boy's pain in me, everything that he was I could feel it. I could feel it in my arms, our connected hands, my shaking legs, everywhere, even my heart.

"I'll help you through this Chase. I swear it. We'll get through it together. I'll be here with you through it all!" I vowed staring him straight in the eyes.

"I wasn't ready to talk about it. I wasn't ready to tell anyone, but I'm glad that I told you Bella. I really am." He said and he leaned forward letting out hands disentangle and he hugged me.

Jasper and Edward were both staring over at us, and in just shrugged looking back at them, Conner was smiling. I knew I needed to help Chase. He was a great friend, he didn't need to bare his pain in silence, I'd be there for him.

The next day I was sitting alone with Jasper in band class, our band was unable to perform since Chase wasn't here today, his mothers case took a turn for the worst and he called me this morning to let me know that he wouldn't be coming in.

Edward was god knows where, doing god knows what, he really wasn't even a part of the band, he showed up to learn songs, and practice, and perform but that was it. It really irked me that he thought he could do whatever he wanted.

And Conner was just being Conner, he wasn't bad looking and he was mingling with the other bands that were basically doing nothing as well.. G-r-e-a-t.

"Bella? Did you here me?" A hand was waving in my face, I looked up and the smile dropped from my face, it was Landon.

"What do you want?" I hissed, and Jasper looked amused.

"Can I come over tonight, I was talking to Charlie, and he said that he wouldn't mind-" I cut him off right there.

"I'm sorry Landon." _No I wasn't. _"But I had plans to go and see Jacob and we have band practice tonight so I won't have time. Maybe in the future you won't ask my father what I'm doing later." I said, and he looked confused.

"Who's Jacob?" Landon said, his blue eyes narrowing in confusion.

"A close friend of mine." _You idiot._

"Oh." He said.

"Well see you later, if I don't sing something today I'll probably break down into particles and die." I said standing up.

"Oh, want to do a duet?" he asked hopeful again.

"Nah, I'm good for now." I said, and I watched him walk away disappointed.

"Do you like him?" I heard Jasper ask from beside me.

"Me? Like Landon? Ha!" I said walking away.

Cold hands wrapped around my waist and he pulled me to him, my back pressing against his chest. It was a good thing that we were in the corner of the room, no one could see us.

"You've been avoiding me all week. I don't like it. It doesn't feel very good to be ignored for no reason." He said.

"Q-quit it, Jasper!" I said trying to pull from his grasp, but he was strong. I sighed. "I'm not ignoring you, so just quit it." I said. I could feel my heart about to explode in my chest, I felt like I could die at any second.

"Bella, you know Landon likes you, right?" He asked.

I was unable to speak, I was too confused, sad, angry, annoyed, and scared.

"J-Jasper just leave me alone!" I huffed annoyed, and I finally found the strength to pull myself from his grip, and I stomped off to the sound room.

I looked back at him, his face a mask of anger and confusion that would probably not end well.

I really needed to get these feelings out, and the only way I knew how to do that was sing a song.

I popped my CD into the Boom Box and I was so ready to just sing. I pressed play and went over to the stage and laid down. The music began to flow and all I needed to do was add the words.

"_Please speak softly_

_For they will hear us_

_And they'll find out_

_Why we don't trust them_

_Speak up dear_

_Cause I cannot hear you_

_I need to know_

_Why we don't trust them_

_Explain to me_

_This conspiracy against me_

_And tell me how_

_I've lost my power_

**Lately it seems like everything have gone to crap, and I didn't have the power to fix it, and it was totally crap. **

_Where can I turn_

_Cause I need something more_

_Surrounded by uncertainty_

_I'm so unsure_

_Tell me why_

_I feel so alone_

_Cause I need to know_

_To whom do I owe_

**Where was I supposed to go from here? I wasn't sure of anything anymore! I'm all alone in this, and I can't figure out who to talk to about anything. **

_Explain to me_

_This conspiracy against me_

_And tell me how_

_I've lost my power_

_I thought we would make it_

_Because you said_

_That we'd make it through_

_And when all security fails_

_Will you be there to help me through_

_Explain to me_

_This conspiracy against me_

_And tell me how_

_I've lost my power"_

I lay there for a moment just staring at the stage lights, just thinking everything had gone to such shit so fast this year. And I really sucked.

"Did you just write that?" I jumped a bit at the sudden volume in the quite room, but I didn't need to look up to know who it was. I felt my legs dangling ever the edge of the stage, the stage itself wasn't that tall, I mean I was short myself and it only came to about my waist. It was an old room.

But nevertheless that voice…that voice belonged to none other than Edward Cullen. I didn't look up at him, I didn't need to, besides if I looked at him it would give him an excuse to start a real conversation, and who wants that?

I heard footsteps, and then I felt hands on my sides, and I looked forward to see Edward leaning over me, his face in mine. He didn't need to be that close.

"I said, 'did you just write that?'." He said then smiled, his icy breath intoxicating me.

"I believe I chose to ignore you." I hissed then shook off his hold and made my way to the back door, I really didn't want to try and get passed him, I had no patience right now, and I really didn't want to get kicked out of school for punching someone.

There was a loud thump as Edward jumped onto the stage, and a few light pats on the ground as he ran in front of me blocking the exit to the back room. His bronze hair a neat mess on top of his head and his topaz eyes seemed to burn into me.

"What do you want from me Edward? I thought we were both in agreement that you hated me, and that I hated you? Why can't we just not talk and keep up with the normal activity?" I sighed looking him straight in his topaz eyes. His eyes…they were intent, and calculating, as if he were asking himself a question.

Step. Step. Step. Step.

Then he was right in my face, directly in my face, and I turned to leave but he swung us both around, pinning me to the wall next to the door with my arms at my sides. So quickly that I didn't even see it coming, like it was such a split decision his lips met mine. His hands came up, resting on my face.

His hands were both light, and strong holding onto my each side of my face as he kissed me, first lightly, then he deepened it, his hands running through my hair. I would have fought him, would have pushed, would have kicked him, if he wasn't stronger than me. I just shut down and let me finish.

When he did I just looked at him tiredly, was this really happening? I saw his eyes dart down to my lips, then back to my face.

"I don't hate you." He breathed, oh my gosh was his scent intoxicating. And I almost didn't notice his head moving down closer to mine…almost. I shot my hand out towards his chest and gently pushed him away. No I wasn't going to let him kiss me again, I was confused enough with trying to figure out if the person I liked me back, and why that person saw it fit to torture me, I didn't need Edward drama too.

"No." I said, His eyes narrowed, and he began to lean back in, but I stopped him again. "Don't." I said breathless. I could feel myself shaking, this wasn't right, nothing about this was right.

I heard him growl, or grunt or something, and he was leaning into me again his beautiful topaz eyes looking fierce and feral.

"I said to quit it Edward, seriously. I don't see why you are even bothering with me right now, we hate each other." I said. "And besides wasn't it you who attacked me that day in the meadow, I had bruises on my wrists for the longest time." I said bitterly.

His eyes went wide and he just stared at me for a while.

"That was different." He finally said.

I about laughed. "Different how? We're still the same people, your still mean, I'm still angry, and your just gave me bruises on my wrists again." I said looking down at the hold that he had on my wrists pinning me against the wall. He let me go almost instantly. "So please tell me how that is any different." I said.

"It just is." He said and looked away.

"Surreee." I said stretching out the word. "Well if you'll please excuse me I have to go call Chase and make sure he's alright." I hissed and pulled myself from the wall, and out the back door. Why did he have to be so damn annoying?

I almost laughed when I walked out of the room and saw Jasper leaning against the door. I turned immediately around to go in the other direction, but Jasper lurched forward grabbing me by my wrists making me draw in a sharp into of breath and wince in pain.

His eyes flashed down to my wrist and his eyes narrowed.

"What happened?" He asked as he pulled me into him and let my head rest on his shoulder. I just shook my head, how could I tell him that his brother just tried to…I don't even know what he just tried to do. He kissed me. I thought with a twinge of hysteria. Tears formed in my eyes. I didn't want to kiss Edward. I didn't mean for it to happen. I couldn't tell Jasper that.

"Bella, tell me what happened." He demanded as he pulled back from me to look me in the eyes. His sympathetic and angry face turned startled as he stared at me, for a reason that I didn't know. Absentmindedly I reached up and touched my face. I almost wished I hadn't, because once I did I could feel the hot tears that were running down my face.

The fact that I was crying in front of Jasper, after having been kissed by his brother, whom I previously thought was a nice guy, who before that I thought was evil, and now I'm confused about him. Did he like me? Or was he just trying to mess with Jasper? If the second ones true then there's no way I can tell Jasper what happened. No. I couldn't. If the first…then in was scared. Scared that he might try it again, it's true that I spend a lot of time in the Sound Room. It really wouldn't be hard for him to find me.

I was trembling in Jaspers arms when the back door to the Sound Room opened and Edward came walking out. I felt my heart rise in my chest, and the immediate urge to run, but I did neither while I was enjoying the comfort of Jaspers embrace.

"Hey, Bella I can't wait till band practice tonight, see you there." He said smirking and walked away.

"Bella you need to tell me what's going on." Jasper said in a final tone.

"It's nothing." I said pulling myself out of his hold and wiping my tears. "Really it's nothing Jasper, I'll see you tonight at Conner's house Ok?" I said and gave him a small hug before walking away. I couldn't believe I had just lied to Jasper.

But it was for his own good.

Maybe is was for mine.

Either way, I couldn't tell him. I didn't need his family in a fight, much less over me. No I wouldn't tell him. It wasn't necessary. I'd just make sure I'm never alone with Edward Cullen ever again.

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I know it's a lot different from the last one! I don't think there's going to be any BellaXChase in here. She's just there for emotional support. I had to subtract part of the drama from this story, it was way too overbearing to think about!

**REVIEW!!**

**REVIEW!!**

**REVIEW!!**

**Really please review! I have the weirdest feeling that no one likes it anymore! It makes me want to cry. **

**So please save my tear ducts and review!!**

**And press that button we all know is blue!**

**THANX**


	9. Cheater

**Ok, i know that this is different from the original one that i had up here, but i just like this better, and i hope you do too**

It was time to go to band practice, and I didn't want to. I got into my truck anyway with some lyrics that I had been working out on my own. When I reached Conner's house I could already hear the music flowing from the garage, but there were already several cars parked in the driveway so I couldn't see in.

As I weaved my way through the cars I heard someone start singing.

"_I've tried, to hide  
But I can't sleep at night  
Everything I think about  
Makes me feel like a version of myself_

They tell, their lies  
And we all synchronize  
Look to, the sky  
Because it's almost over"

Finally I made it through all the cars, and I saw two things that surprised me, first was that it was EDWARD who was singing, and second was that Landon was perched on one of the couches that Conners mom had put in the garage for us to relax on. _  
_  
_We want, the truth  
Give us the absolute  
We need, your help  
Cause we've got nothing_

_We want, the truth  
Give us the absolute  
We need, your help  
Cause we've got nothing left to lose  
I know, we've tried  
This thing a million times  
But put me out  
Cause I'm on fire"_

I lingered just outside the garage watching everything and no one noticed me. Edward had a great voice.

"_Don't talk, if you  
Are going to tell me the truth  
Don't tell me you know  
You've got everything under control  
_  
_We can't have it all  
But we can break the fall  
This time I'm letting go  
Cause I can't take it anymore"_

"Cut!" Yelled Conner spotting me, and jumping down from the stage to give me a huge hug, it hurt, mostly because his guitar was still hanging across his chest.

"Oh! Sorry!" he said realizing my discomfort, then we both laughed.

"It's cool. Oh, and so was that song!" I said amazed. He nodded.

"Edward wrote it, and since you were a little late he wanted us to run through it. Great, huh?"

I nodded.

"So what's he doing here?" I asked referring to Landon.

"Oh, Landon and I have become good friends, so he wanted to come down and watch us practice, so I said sure." He said smiling oblivios.

"Great." I said sourly. "well I brought a song with me, you guys already have the music and learned it I think." I said.

"Which song?" he asked

"Together." I said meekly.

"Yeah, we've learned that one." He said smiling, then he walked back over to the guys. "We're going to be doing Bella's song now_. Forgotten_, we've learned it aleady." He said.

"They nodded and I hopped up onto the stage and Edward handed me the microphone letting him hand graze mine, which was totally unneeded.

"Alright, let's start!" Conner yelled and he started started strumming out the notes.

_  
"You can only move as fast as whose in front of you  
And if you assume just like them, what good will it do?  
So find out for yourself, so your ignorance will stop bleeding through._

_Only one thing  
big enough to fill the void that's inside of you  
It's just a breath away. You can breathe today._

_So many, Lies swarming, Around You, You're suffocating  
The empty, shape in you,  
Steals your breath you're suffocating_

_Logic forces me to believe in this and now I've learned to see  
and I can only say what I've seen and heard and only you can choose  
And every choice you make will affect you, search your own self_

_You can breathe today,_

_So many, Lies swarming, Around You, You're suffocating  
The empty, shape in you,  
Steals your breath you're suffocating_

_Big enough to fill the void that's inside of you,  
It's just a breath away_

_So many, Lies swarming, Around You, You're suffocating  
The empty, shape in you,  
Steals your breath you're suffocating_

_You can breathe today  
Breathe today"_

I finished with my eyes resting on Landon, who smiled up at me. I rolled my eyes and lept from the stage. I needed some water or something, my throat was feeling dry.

"Hey, Conner! Do you have water or something?" I asked him. He was still on stage messing around with his guitar with Jasper.

"Yeah! I the fridge, help yourself." He said.

"Thanks." I replied.

"I'll get it for you Bella." Landon offered and as he got up his phone started to ring. "Can you answer that for me, and just talk till I get back with your water, I have a call I'm waiting for and I can't miss it." He said smiling and I nodded.

I picked up the small black phone, and clicked TALK.

"Hello?" I said into the phone.

"Hello, um…is Landon there?" It was a girls voice…it sounded like one that I knew too.

"Melony?" I asked unsure.

"Y-Yeah." Came the stuttering response.

"Mel! It's me Bella! Oh, I've missed you so much!" I squealed.

"Bella?! Oh my God! How have you been? I know that Landon transferred to your school but I didn't realize that you'd stay his friend…or mine!" She said excited. Now I was confused.

"Why wouldn't I Mel?" I asked.

"Well since Landon and I slept together right before you moved I didn't think you'd…" She kept talking but I wasn't listening, I was too busy looking at Landon. Who was standing just feet from me with a smile on his face and I bottle of water in his hand.

"Yeah…I know weird right? Well I'll tell him to call you back Melony." I said my voice already hoarse as I let the phone drop from my hand and I landed with a thud on the couch.

"I can't believe you would do that." I said tears in my eyes.

"B-Bella what's wrong?" He sasked concerned reaching his hand out to touch my shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" I squealed my voice rising and cracking as I tried to hold back my tears.

"Bella, can you please tell me what's going on here?" He asked desperate.

"How could you Landon!? How could you sleep with her?! We had just broke up! I loved you!" I screamed and the tears began falling down my face. Everyone and everything became quiet and every pair of eyes in the garage were on me, and Landon and the scene unfolding.

"Bella! It was an accident it was just one night!" he said trying to defend himself.

"You were supposed to be MY boyfriend!" I yelled at him. "Not Melonys'! And how could you bring Melony into this?! She was my best friend." I said breaking down burrying my face in my hands.

"Bella, I'm sorry! It was just one night, we were both a little drunk, and couldn't drive so she crashed at my house, it really was an accident, I hardly remember it!" He said lurching forward to take me in his arms.

I fought against him. "Don't touch me! You're filthy! I can't believe you!" I yelled pushing at his chest. Everyone still watched us, everyones face was shocked, and angry. Conner looked sad and sympathetic, after all he had invited Landon over.

"Bella, I always loved you, I still do. It was just a mistake." He said looking at me helplessly. "Why do you think that I came here? Why do you think I left home to come and find you? I needed to be with you again, I couldn't get you out of my head." He said.

"Looks like you wasted the trip. You should have never come here." I said wiping tears from my eyes. "Can…can you please just leave Landon?" I asked. "We…we have to practice and I don't think that I…could focus with you here right now." I said.

He nodded. "Bella, I really am sorry." He said.

I just looked away from him, standing with my back turned on him until I heard his car pull out and drive up the street. It was then the I collapsed to the ground in tears in my knees.

After that there was a mad scramble to get to me. Conner was apologizing for letting Landon come to our practice. Chase was spitting a slur of curses that were directed at Landon. Edward was standing further away than the rest silently. Jasper had his arms wrapped around me, trying to calm me down.

"I'm…" I was going to say "I'm alright." But I needed to rephrase it, so I did by saying. "I'm going to be fine." I said getting up and seperating myself from Jasper.

"But can you guys help me with something?" I asked them. They all nodded, even Edward. "Great, it may take awhile but I just thought of a great song. And I need to perform I tomorrow." I said attempting a smile.

* * *

Finally after an all night practice, it was time for music class. It was time for me to do my new songs. I was only going to do one, due to prompting and support from my band they convinced me to do two. The first one would be our normal music, then we'd slide my song in right beside it. It was a great plan.

We were all sitting in music when Mrs. Levinski called out band up, and we started to play our first song.

"_Slipping down a slide  
I did enjoy the ride  
Don't know what to decide  
You lied to me  
You looked me in the eye  
It took me by surprise  
Now are you gratified  
You cried to me_

_La, la, la, la, la_

_  
Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of you face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_When I was feeling down  
You'd start to hang around  
And then I found your hands all over me  
And that was out of bounds  
You filthy rotten hound  
It's badder than it sounds, believe me_

_La, la, la, la, la_

_  
Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of you face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_Hey, you gotta get over it  
Hey, you gotta get over it_

_It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of you face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad_

_Don't turn around  
I'm sick and I'm tired of you face  
Don't make this worse  
You've already gone and got me mad  
It's too bad I'm not sad  
It's casting over  
It's just one of those things  
You'll have to get over it_

_You'll have to get over it"_

I found his face, it was already sad and regretful, well if he felt like that now, I couldn't wait to see what his face would look like after this next song. Oh, it was going to be hilarious. The teacher opened her mouth as if to tell us to get off the stage, but the music picked up again. We were by no means done.

**(A/N you need to read these lyrics to fully understand everything. It's the perfect song to go along with this)**

"_It's strange to think the songs we used to sing  
The smiles, the flowers, everything: is gone  
Yesterday I found out about you  
Even now just looking at you: feels wrong  
You say that you'd take it all back, given one chance  
It was a moment of weakness and you said yes..._

_You should've said no, you should've gone home  
You should've thought twice before you let it all go  
You should've know that word, bout what you did with her_

_Would get back to me…  
And I should've been there, in the back of your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why  
You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet...  
You should've said no, baby and you might still have me_

**His face was ashen and sad. Not quite sad enough though. Not yet. **

_You can see that I've been crying  
And baby you know all the right things: to say  
But do you honestly expect me to believe  
We could ever be the same...  
You say that the past is the past, you need one chance  
It was a moment of weakness and you said yes..._

_You should've said no, you should've gone home  
You should've thought twice before you let it all go  
You should've know that word, bout what you did with her_

_Would get back to me…  
And I should've been there, in the back of your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why  
You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet...  
You should've said no, baby and you might still have me_

_I can't resist... before you go, tell me this  
Was it worth it...  
Was she worth this..._

_No... no no no..._

_You should've said no, you should've gone home  
You should've thought twice before you let it all go  
You should've know that word, bout what you did with her _

_Would get back to me…  
And I should've been there, in the back of your mind  
I shouldn't be asking myself why  
You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet...  
You should've said no, baby and you might still have me"_

His face was totally heart broken and I watched shocked as he got up and walked out of the room slamming the door behind him.

"Miss. Swan that was nice, but do you think that we could hear one by Mr. Cullen, if you don't mind?" She said ticking something off on her board.

I looked across the room to see Edward already getting up and making his way over to the stage. He hopped up and gave me a bright smile, a real one.

"You did great." He said giving me a hug. I awkwardly got off the stage and went to sit in our bands corner. Then the music started again and Edward started to sing.

"_Memories consume  
Like opening the wound  
I'm picking me apart again  
You all assume  
I'm safe here in my room  
Unless I try to start again"_

**Wow he was great. **

_I don't want to be the one  
The battles always choose  
'Cause inside I realize  
That I'm the one confused_

_I don't know what's worth fighting for  
Or why I have to scream  
I don't know why I instigate  
And say what I don't mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I know it's not alright  
So I'm breaking the habit  
I'm breaking the habit  
Tonight_

**I couldn't help but think that he was singing about something real, something that happened to him, I just didn't know what. **

_Clutching my cure  
I tightly lock the door  
I try to catch my breath again  
I hurt much more  
Than anytime before  
I had no options left again_

_I don't want to be the one  
The battles always choose  
'Cause inside I realize  
That I'm the one confused_

_I don't know what's worth fighting for  
Or why I have to scream  
I don't know why I instigate  
And say what I don't mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I'll never be alright  
So, I'm breaking the habit  
I'm breaking the habit  
Tonight_

**His eyes met mine, and they burned with something I'd never seen them burn with…love. Wh-what the heck was going on?**

_  
I'll paint it on the walls  
'Cause I'm the one at fault  
I'll never fight again  
And this is how it ends_

_I don't know what's worth fighting for  
Or why I have to scream  
But now I have some clarity  
to show you what I mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I'll never be alright  
So, I'm breaking the habit  
I'm breaking the habit  
I'm breaking the habit  
Tonight"_

His eyes were still on me as the crowd stood and clapped for him, like really, really clapped. They must have really liked it. I was still frozen, what in the world had that look in his eyes meant?

I wish I knew.

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	10. Please, Help Me

Landon didn't show up on Friday for school. Or at any of the weekend band practices. He did show up at school on Monday, though he didn't talk to me. I had great support from my band though, and even a little bit of support from Edward who wasn't being his usual creepy self.

Now, the group decided to turn over out next few performances over to Edward, and that was fine with me. I really didn't mind.

"Landon Ryan? Can you and your band please come up and perform?" Mrs. Levinski said.

"But I wanted to go today!" Jessica complained.

"Too bad." I heard Landon say, and I almost laughed.

Him and his band stepped up onto the stage and his eyes flashed over to me, and the music started. Then he started to sing.

"_Check yes Juliet  
Are you with me?  
Rain is falling down on the sidewalk  
I won't go until you come outside._

**Oh God, he knew that I loved Romeo and Juliet. **

_Check yes Juliet  
Kill the limbo  
I'll keep tossing rocks at your window  
There's no turning back for us tonight._

_Lace up your shoes  
Eh Oh Eh Ohhh  
Here's how we do:_

_Run, baby, run  
Don't ever look back.  
They'll tear us apart  
If you give them the chance.  
Don't sell your heart.  
Don't say we're not meant to be.  
Run, baby, run.  
Forever we'll be  
You and me._

**What is the crap? He's the one who's tearing us apart!**

_Check yes Juliet  
I'll be waiting  
Wishing, wanting  
Yours for the taking.  
Just sneak out  
And don't tell a soul goodbye.  
Check yes Juliet  
Here's the countdown  
3... 2... 1... now fall in my arms  
Now they can change the locks  
Don't let them change your mind_

**Pfft. Like I'd fall into his arms. He looked over to me, and then he started singing in my direction. Everyone in the room scrambled to see what he was looking at. Yeah, me. I ducked my head, but when I looked back he was still singing to me. **

_Lace up your shoes  
Eh Oh Eh Ohhh  
Here's how we do_

_Run, baby, run  
Don't ever look back  
They'll tear us apart  
If you give them the chance  
Don't sell your heart  
Don't say we're not meant to be  
Run baby run  
Forever we'll be  
You and me_

**His eyes softened as turned away from me and started to sing back to his audience. **

_  
We're flying through the night  
We're flying through the night  
Way up high,  
The view from here is getting better with  
You by my side_

_Run baby run_  
_Don't ever look back  
They'll tear us apart  
If you give them the chance  
Don't sell your heart  
Don't say we're not meant to be  
Run baby run  
Forever we'll be..._

_Run baby run  
Don't ever look back  
They'll tear us apart  
If you give them the chance  
Don't sell your heart  
Don't say we're not meant to be  
Run baby run  
Forever we'll be  
You and me  
You and me  
You and me"_

**His song ended and I sat, unmovable and a bit frightened. Was this an apology? Was this for me? It made no sense! I was so confused. **

I was still shaking my head as I got up and ran to the Sound Room. Everyone in my band just stared after me, but it was their turn on the stage so there was no way they could come after me. I felt a little relieved by that fact, and a little scared.

I walked into the Sound Room and took it in for what seemed like the hundredth time. As I stood in the doorway and looked to my left there was the stage that ran the whole length of the wall. It was low to the ground, but not too low. It probably went back a good 20 feet before it ended. The back door was tucked into the right side of the stage.

The rest of the room was just empty other than a few stray chairs, and little beaten up table that held a small boom box.

I sighed as I walked through the room and placed my CD into the boom box. I had no intention of singing with it, mostly because it was a guys song, and because Tokio Hotel always had a way of calming me down.

"_It's getting light outside  
She is still there  
But no one cares  
_

**Yeah, no one cares. I knew that. **

_  
"They said no happy birthday yesterday  
Without her  
Do you want to see if  
You're flying through  
The night_

_This gift is what you'll need  
You're gonna be alright  
Eyes closed and fall_

_First time on the edge  
The scars will stay forever  
Side to side with death  
The moment that feels better  
Darkness and light  
Are blinding her sight  
She's not coming back"_

**The door to the sound room opened. **

_  
"It's getting light outside"_

**Landon is standing in the doorway.**

_  
"She cannot sleep"  
_

**Small smile on his face as he came towards me. **

_  
"'Cause time stood still"_

**His hand was on my face as he leaned down and kissed me. **

_  
"Someone's hand is touching her"_

**Please, just let it be over. **

_  
"She has no will_

_Each time when it hurts  
She just feels so alone"_

**He pulls back as he looks at me and smiles. **

_  
"She doesn't care at all  
Her memories have  
Long gone  
Eyes closed and fall"_

**I closed my eyes as he started to kiss down my neck. It felt so **_**wrong.**_** But if I push him away…he might…get forceful. **

_"Closer to the edge  
The scars will stay forever_"

**I felt tears spring up into my eyes as he kissed his way back up to my mouth**

_  
"Side to side with death  
This time is even better."_

**I needed to stop this. I had to. **

_  
"Darkness and light"_

**I pushed him back, and his face turned sinister. **

_  
"Are blinding her sight"_

**I'd had enough, even though I'd never win against him. I can't just give in.**

_  
"She's not coming back"_

**I won't be weak anymore. **

_"She shuts the door  
She longs for more"_

**He pushed me onto the floor with a thud, and I smacked my head from on the ground. **

_  
"And more  
And more"_

**I got dizzy rather quickly. "Jasper! He-Help!" I tried to yell but my voice came out as little more than normal volume. **

_"She shuts the door  
She longs for more  
And more  
And more  
Just once more"_

_"_**_No one can hear_ you Bells." Landon whispered in my ear.**

"**I think you're wrong about that." Said someone from the door. I felt Landons' hold on my forearms tighten. **

"_Everyone is watching her"_

**Edward, Jasper, Chase and Conner were all in the doorway, and they looked livid. **

_  
"Her arms are so sore  
But she doesn't care  
Anymore"  
_

**I finally broke down into tears. This was too much. I was tired of this.**

_  
"Falling from the edge  
The scars will stay forever"_

**I felt the room spinning. But wasn't I laying down.**

_  
"Side to side with death  
This might seem even better  
Darkness and light  
Are blinding her sight  
She's not coming back  
Not coming back"_

"**Bella! Bella! Come one Bella stay with us!" A voice demanded. **

"**S-so…sorry." I whispered. **

_"The sky is casting over  
Her last wish  
Stays unsaid"_

I was able to open my eyes after a few moments. Edward and Conner were blocking both exits from the sound room. Chase and Jasper were standing over me and just staring at me. Once my eyes had opened Jasper got up and walked over to Landon, grabbing him by the shirt.

"You're lucky I don't kill you right now!" He hissed in Landons' face I'd never seen this before, Jasper was _pissed!_

"It's none of your business!" Landon shouted back at him. Quicker than I could even see Jaspers' fist shot up, and for a moment I thought he was going to punch Landon. He actually probably was going to, only Edward had restrained Jaspers' arm.

Slowly and shakily I managed to get to my feet with some help from Chase.

"Are you sure you're okay, Bella?" He asked looking at me face, I was sure that uncontrollable tears were still running down my face, so there was no way I could lie.

"No Chase, I'm not okay." I said shaking my head, and I found Landons' eyes on me.

"Why?" I asked him starting to shake again. "What did I ever do to you?" I said relapsing into tears again. Jasper let the fabric of Landons' shirt slip from his hand as he turned to me.

"Let's go." He said grabbing at my hand, and I winced in pain at the new bruise that was surfacing on my wrist.

Pretty much immediately Jasper noticed, and muttered a sorry as he pulled me through the empty hallways.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"_You're _going home. And I'm going to go kick the shit out of Landon." Jasper hissed. Whoa, did Jasper just swear? I was way surprised, and a lot terrified.

"No…don't. It won't help anything." I said reaching out my other hand and grabbing the wrist of his hand that was holding my other hand.

"It will me." He said. I stared at his, anger seething off of me in waves, there was no way I'd let them fight like that.

"Don't worry I'll let it slide _this _time." He said.

I rolled my eyes, and then a thought dawned on me.

"Jasper I can't leave, not without telling someone, or you know getting permission from my dad." I said nervously. "And anyway I don't need to leave."

We stopped in front of the main doors, and he just looked at me, hard.

"Yes, I'm sorry but you do need to leave." He said glaring past me, at what I wasn't sure. I turned my head slowly, just over my shoulder, it was enough to see Edward standing all the way at the other end of the hallway, staring back at us.

"Bella, go." He said.

"No, I'm going back to class, you two can hash it out here all you want, but it's really none of your business anyway, is it Jasper?" I said, then I turned and began walking back the way we came, and stopped when I got right next to Edward. "And you are going to leave me alone, and Landon. I'll deal with Landon myself. I can do it.." I hissed, and walked away.

"We'll see." He said with a smile, and I turned so quick I didn't think that he expected it, and I grabbed onto the collar of his shirt, pulled his face into mine. "You will. I promise you that you will." I hissed and walked away, I guess I would leave early. I couldn't stay here any longer.

_**

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Review for the sake of all that Is Twilight!!

No honestly if ^ this can't make you review then idk what to do anymore**. : /**


	11. Faint Hearted

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Hope you like the new chapter! I just spent a half hour of my life on this for you people so you better like it!!

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Everything was as normal as it would ever be right now, I really don't know what was said after I left yesterday, but Landon had totally backed off, Jasper was distancing himself, and Edward was still annoying but that was to be expected. Conner was less then oblivious to the tension now. I think he had some questions.

Chase was back at school today they had his mother stabilized, but they didn't expect her to last long. He had come back to school so broken hearted and confided everything in me. I could feel his pain cutting into me like a knife. It was terrible, the entire situation, and it had inspired me to write a song for Chase. I was supposed to perform it today next period.

Ugh, I really didn't even want to go to music class anymore.

"Bella, you in there?" I felt someone tap me on the shoulder, I looked up to see Jasper. This really confused me because I knew for a fact that he wasn't in my class right now. I looked around, and noticed that I was standing in the hallway; my hand poised on my locker dial. Interesting.

I shook my head trying to clear it. "Yeah, sorry I'm just spaced out, I'm really nervous today." I said. He looked at me, his topaz eyes smoldering, I could tell he wanted to tell me something, but he held it back.

I turned back to my locker, it popped open and I ditched my books, closed it again, and spun the dial to make sure it was locked.

"What are you nervous about?" He asked quietly. I bit my lip, how could I tell him anything that has to do with Chases' mother? No one else knows that she's dying, he confided that in me. I couldn't betray his trust.

"It's fine Bella, you can tell me." he said, reaching out to touch my shoulder, I visibly flinched, it wasn't on purpose, but his touch always did that to me. I saw him smirk, and his hand balled into a fist as he pulled it away.

"It-It's just that I wrote this song for Chase, and I'm supposed to perform it today, and I just don't know if it's good, or if it will make him feel worse, or if my take on things is just completely wrong."

"I'm sure you'll do just fine, I mean it's you after all." he said flashing a smiles before ducked his head and walked away.

I felt like the biggest piece of crap ever, but that didn't change the fact that the bell rang, and that I was on my way to the music room, and that I had to perform.

I felt a knot in my stomach, and I ran to the bathroom. As you might have guessed, everything that I had for breakfast and lunch was now gone. I pulled my mini toothbrush and took care of the smell. nasty.

I felt even more like crap now, as I pushed open the bathroom door. I should have expected it, I mean this just wasn't my day; I should have known that Jasper would be waiting outside the bathroom for me. He didn't even say anything; he took one look at me and pulled me into his arms.

"If it makes you that nervous you shouldn't do it." He said in my ear. This wasn't right he shouldn't be hugging me, not with the feelings that he had, not with the feelings that it brought me.

"Jasper, you can't hug me like this, we can't be like this." I said trying to pull away from his, but he tightened his hold.

"I don't understand anything, not one thing that's going on with me right now, I shouldn't like you, I shouldn't want to be with you, but all I know is that I'm the happiest that I've ever been when I hold you in my arms." He said.

"J-Jasper we can't be..." I felt my heart flutter in my chest when his mouth moved to my neck. Then ever so lightly he kissed my neck, it was cold, and it made me shiver.

"Jasper STOP." I said pushing him away, with tears in my eyes, when he did this, confusion tore through me like wildfire, so much so that it brought me pain to think about anything. I mean DUH! I liked Jasper, but I couldn't see us together in anyway. He was inhumanly perfect whereas I was far from.. I took two careful steps back, and then turned and ran to the Music room.

Chase was waiting for me at the door, he took my hand, and the guilt and regret tore through me again. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me over to our bands corner.

"Are you ready to sing the song you wrote me?" He asked holding me tighter as we walked over to our spot.

"Haha, I'm a lot nervous, I don't think you'll like it." I said honestly, and he laughed.

"I'll love it since you wrote it for me." I jumped about a foot in the air when the door slammed closed, I turned to see, now furious looking Jasper, and I ducked my head ashamed.

He looked in my direction, and then quickly walked right by us and picked up his guitar.

"Bella Swan, you're up first today, are you ready?" Mrs. Levinski said.

"S-sure." I said and my heart began pounding again, my head felt lighter, but I climbed onto the stage alone. I had a CD with music put on it so that I could learn the song alone, and so I could surprise Chase.

"Whenever you're ready." She said holding her clipboard. I nodded. I took the mic in my hands, I felt myself become lightheaded but I pushed the feelings back, and squinted through the pain.

"Ok, so this is my song." I said slowly, and reached back to click play. I couldn't even feel my lags anymore; I never got stage fright, what was this. This had to be something else.

The song started so I began to sing:

_"Her headaches are constant increasing in pain,  
With each passing day.  
She can't even manage to stand on her own it's gotten so bad.  
But you think in saying there's no use in praying,  
Still she bows her head, so she can say,  
Thank you for just one more day.  
Supernatural patience graces her face,  
and her voice never raises,  
It's all because of a love, never let go of." _

**The room was still spinning, fading in and out so quick I wasn't sure what I was looking at.**

"_He has every reason to throw up his fists_

_In the face of his God who let his mother die  
through all the prayers and tears, she still passed in pain anyway"_

**I stole a glance at Chase, and he was staring at me with a smile. Ok, so good so far. **

"You think in saying there's no use in praying  
but still he bows his head so he can say  
thank you for ending her pain"

**I looked to him again and tears were visable on his eyes, and pain tore through me like wildfire.**

Supernatural patience graces his face  
and his voice never raises  
All because of a love never let go of  
never let go of…

_He is teaching me…_

_What love really means." _

"Great job Miss. Swan. That was terrific!" Mrs. Levinski said clapping. Then all around my vision everything went white and hazy. It started a kaleidoscope effect and everything tuned out, and so did I.

Then I could barely see straight, and I felt myself drifting, and falling, backward.

"BELLA!" I heard someone scream, and that was it, I was done, I hit the floor, and the mic made a weird squeaking noise as it too hit to ground. So much for having no stage fright, I thought before everything went dark.

**

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CPOV (chase point of view)

* * *

Bella went down, hard, right on the ground. I was so frozen in fear.  
_Not again, Not again. Oh god._

**

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JPOV

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I could feel Bella's fatigue from here, she was spent. Still it bothered me that she was denying how she felt for me, I looked over at Chase who was smiling, he was the happiest that he's been in a while, but it was directed at _my _Bella.

I heard Edward snort and looked at him, and I growled back.

In the brief moment that I looked away I saw something out of the corner of my eye, it was Bella; she was becoming even more stressed. This wasn't good. Then I saw the last thing that I wanted to see, Bella's eyes rolled back into her head, and she fell straight backward.

"BELLA!" I screamed and jumped from where I was without a moment's hesitation.

The mic hit the floor letting out a horrible screech and people all around the room covered their ears.

When I reached the stairs Bella was already unconscious. I gathered her into my arms, and without waiting or asking I walked out of the room, and then made a mad dash to the hospital, to my father, the only person that I trusted with my Bella. I didn't even care that I was leaving school early, I'd have Alice or Rosalie take my jeep somewhere so that I can say that that's how I got her to the hospital. I was running as fast as my abilities would let me.

"Please be okay." I whispered in her ear.

"Ja-JASPER!" She screamed, her eyes were open, when did that happen. Everything was rushing by, and her eyes landed on mine, scared, and frantic. How could I have let this happen, she'd find out now.

"W-what _are you_?" She said panicked, and I closed my eyes, the pain in my chest from her words was deep. She would hate me now, hate what I am, and fear me. I knew that, that's always how it worked.

"I'm a...I'm a vampire." I said, her eyes widened in a way that I hate, and I sighed.

"Am...am I dreaming?" She asked.

"I really want to say yes right now, but no, Bella, you're not." I promised her. She seemed to take a really deep breath, and then she let out an annoyed sigh.

"You can put me down now, I'm fine." She said.

"No, you're not." I said.

"Where are you taking me?" She asked.

"To the hospital, you fainted on stage...and well I was worried." I said sincerely.

I couldn't hear what she said next but it sounded something like. _'Charlie's gonna have a heart attack.' _Whoever Charlie was, I felt bad for him.

"Really you can put me down, people faint all the time." She said as I stopped in front of my hospital.

"Well we're already here, so we might as well have a look at you." I said.

"Well I can at least walk in there myself right?" She asked and then I put her down.

She seemed to be taking this surprisingly well. Then what she said next startled me.

"So Edward, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, and your parents, aren't normal too, right?"

"That's true." I said, and she sighed. "Lead on." She said gesturing to the door.

"Right." I said, we walked up to the front desk, and the receptionist was there.

"Ah, well hello Jasper." She said.

"Hi Candace, is my father in, it's an emergency?"

"Yeah, just let me page him over." She said then leaned forward into the intercom and said. "_Doctor Cullen to the front desk, Doctor Cullen to the front desk." She _finished and flashed me a smile.

"You're a lifesaver Candace." I breathed and she laughed, it was ironic considering the fact that she was a receptionist in a hospital where everyone else saved peoples lives.

"No problem." She said.

"Jasper, what do you need son?" I turned and saw Carlisle walking up to us, a strange look on his face.

"Dad, this is Bella, I think you need to check her out, she fainted at school." I said.

"Ok, around what time did this happen?" He asked his eyes landing on Bella.

"About 2 minutes ago I'd say." Bella said with a smirk, and his eyes shot up to me, and we shared a knowing glance. he knew that she knew.

"Right..." he said nervously."Well, let's see if we can find out what the problem is." he said and led her to his office. This was just so very strange, she didn't seem to be put out by any of this.

We'll see soon enough though.

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Hope you liked it, I need more reviews you lazy bums. JUST CLICK THE BUTTON OR I'M DONE WITH THIS. I'll make Bella die from some illness next time and it will be over!! Muahahahaha! REVIEW!


	12. Explanations

**Sorry for the delay, hope you like it. Not my best, but, I'm going through some stuff. So here it is. **

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BPOV

Carlisle worked fast, checking my vitals, asking me questions.

"How do you feel?" He asked.

"Fine."

"Were you experiencing any type of hysteria?" He asked looking at me levelly.

"Nope." I replied a smile on my face.

He didn't say anything else, he just kept looking from me to his clip board, then back to me.

"Well Bella, I can't see anything out of the ordinary, I think you were just too stressed out, and it was taking it's toll on you." He said smiling widely, and I looked him in the eyes, the same topaz as all his "adopted" children. Eh. _Must be a vampire thing, _I thought.

"Have you been under a lot of stress lately?" He asked getting up from his chair and sliding his clip board into the little basket on the door.

"Stress…" I thought about my issues with Landon, Jasper, Edward, and Chase. Then with everything that's going on with Chase's mom, and being new here. "I guess you could say that." I said shifting awkwardly on the doctors table.

"Well, can you try to keep that level down? It's really going to affect you health." He said his eyes boring into mine. I nodded slowing and slipped down from the table, sliding my feet back into the flip-flops that I had worn to school.

I turned and put him hand on the doorknob when Carlisle said: "I'll be out to discuss everything with you and Jasper properly in a few minutes. If you could wait in the waiting room for me that would be great." He said.

"Of course Mr. Cullen." I said.

"Please, call me Carlisle." He said with a smile, and I nodded, and slipped out of the room.

As soon as I shut the door behind me, my smile vanished and I turned to see Jasper standing a few yards down the hallway eyeing my cautiously. He took one step closer to me, he looked tensed as if I might run at any moment.

I stood my ground, didn't move a muscle as I looked him over again, extremely pale, bags under his gorgeous topaz eyes, shaggy blond hair, and muscles. He did look a bit out of the ordinary, but I'd never have guessed he was a vampire.

"Bella…" He whispered, and took a few more steps towards me.

"We need to wait in the waiting room, Carlisle said that he'd be out to discuss…things." I said shifting to my other foot.

"Right." He said.

I walked past him, grabbing his sleeve as I did and tugged him along with me. He seemed shocked for a moment, but he just smiled and followed silently behind me.

"You know Jasper, I knew you were different I just didn't know how." I said as I kept in front of him, I felt his hand tighten slightly on mine, and I smiled in spite of myself.

When we reached the waiting room it was completely empty, interesting, shouldn't there be like patients in a hospital waiting to be treated

"This is the Doctors lounge." Jasper said.

"How did you know what I was-"

"In time." He said causing me to blush. If Jasper Cullen could read my thoughts, I'd have a lot of explaining to

"Okay then." I said nervously, and Jasper just smiled again.

We took two of the many empty seats and just waiting in silence for Carlisle to be done. When he finally stepped into the _lounge_ he shut the door behind him…locked it. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't scared.

Jasper seemed to notice my fear and chuckled, and Carlisle was laughing.

"Um…hey…yeah…not getting the joke." I said strangely.

"I'm sorry…it's just the look on your face and your emotions were totally hilarious." Jasper said, and I was beginning to get angry.

"How do you know how I-"

"I guess now is as good of time as any for you to find out, huh?" Jasper asked poking my in the side, and I turned and glared at him from the corner of my eyes.

Carlisle pulled up and chair and sat in front of us, ready to explain to me the huge secret which I had uncovered.

He told me how he was a vampire, and he was changed so long ago, and denied his thirst only feeding on animals, never humans, and how not many vampires denied their thirst in such a manner. He told me that he had taken Jasper into his home after he found him wandering around, a little time after the civil war? and that Jasper had 'special' talents that went beyond that of a normal vampires super speed, strength, and hearing.

"I can sense and control emotions." Jasper said giving me a crooked smile that made me turn red. "That's how I knew that you were feeling." he said in code referring to the fact that he obviously knew that I liked him and that my relationship with Chase was all an escape.

"If you knew my feelings, then you should have noticed how stressed I was, and left me alone." I said not laying off for a second or giving him a break, he needed to get his too.

"Yeah, but I know that you like me, and I like you too, and with Edward throwing himself into it, I had to act!" He said sharply his topaz eyes boring into my brown.

"That doesn't even matter Edward is a jerk! I don't like him anyway, gosh Jasper." I said turning my head away from him.  
"Bella…I'm sorry." he said quite seriously, and I had to laugh.

Carlisle sat baffled by the entire exchange of words, so we filled him in on everything that's been going on. He was rather surprised, not mad, he actually seemed a bit happy.

"You're not…mad?" I asked.

"Heavens no! All the other members of the family have found their life mates, Alice with Edward, Rosalie with Emmett, I'm just glad that Jasper has found someone to love." Carlisle said and I blushed. Love?

"So what happens now?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" He asked shocked as Jasper looked.

"Well, I'm not a genius, but I'm not dumb. I could probably say very few humans know of the existence of vampires, and probably fewer live to tell about it. So what happens to me?"

"Umm…" Carlisle was about to say something when Jasper cut him off by growling.

"What, what's wrong?" I asked looking between the two.

"It's the only thing that makes sense Jasper, be reasonable! We can't have the Volturi here! We can't afford that!"

Jasper was livid again, he didn't appear to be listening to a word that Carlisle was saying.

"Can someone please include me here?" I asked getting mad.

"Bella, it's a law, no humans can know about us, the ones that do end up dead…or…" He broke off with a look from Jasper.

"Tell me." I hissed, but Carlisle remained silent. "Dammit Jasper I think I have a right to know here, I mean it is my life!" I screeched, and he flinched back.

"She's right son." Carlisle said agreeing with me. Jasper gave one final glare at Carlisle before turning himself back to me. The look of anger clear in his eyes, and I was actually scared.

I hadn't meant to make him aware of my unease, but he caught it just the same, and attempted to compose himself with little success.

"In our world, humans who learn about us have three options. The first, is to die. Rather crude, and blunt to put it that way, but it's the truth. The second, is that they become our…food." He said with a shiver.

"And the third?" I asked.

"The third is that we change you, make you one of us." Jasper said his eyes leaving mine.

Silently I weighed my options, the idea of death was just unthinkable. Absurd really. I knew what my answer would have to be, and so did they.

"So…when do we do this?" I asked them slowly, and Jaspers head shot up, startled, and surprised, and maybe even a little happy, just a little.

"Well, we'll have to discuss this with our family, Bella, but I don't see them having any objections. You should come by our house after school, you are, after all a part of this situation." Carlisle said with a smile. No objections, huh? We'll see what Edward and stick-up-her-butt Rosalie say. I thought bitterly.

Jasper seemed to catch my drift and he just laughed.

Jasper…um…took us back to school, and we finished the school day with a rush of questions and I breathed a sigh of relief when it was over. Everyone filed out of the doors, and the Cullen's went to their cars.

Jasper's jeep was gone from the morning escapade, and they were all filing into Edward's Volvo, and Rosalie's BMW. Jasper decided to run with me, and we beat them there with no effort.

We sat…patiently on one of the many couches and love seats in the Cullen living room until we heard the cars pull in.

Edward walked in first. The look on his face…can you say Kodak Moment? Then came his voice. "What the hell is she doing her Jasper?!" He screamed. Alice trotted in not so late after him, wrapping her small arms around his waist, followed by Emmett and Rosalie.

"Welcome home kids." Carlisle said, and they all looked at him. "Meet the newest member to our family, Isabella Marie Swan, I believe you go to school together."

With his words panic ensued.

**Hope you liked it, sorry for the wait, fanfiction must have been on crack or something. W.E here it is. **

**Love. **

**Me**


	13. Roses

**BPOV**

"I mean it Carlisle! What the heck is she doing here?" Edward raged and I cringed back into Jaspers arms. "She is not part of this family!" He screamed his finger pointed straight at me.

"Edward calm down, please. I have given Bella the choice mostly because we already have close ties with the Volturi and don't need this getting out, and also because…I think Jasper has-" Jasper cut Carlisle off with a blinding smile and turned his smile back to his siblings.

"Because I've finally found my life mate." He said, and I think Edward swore, Emmett said "Seriously?!" I'm not sure what Rosalie did, I'm guessing nothing, and the only reason that I'm not sure of what happened is because Alice was freaking out!

She screeched and threw herself onto the both of us giving us both hugs.

"Ak! Alice let me go!" Jasper boomed, and then a huge weight crashed into me.

"Alice! Watch it! She's still a freaking human! Don't kill her!" I heard him yelling but almost everyone else was laughing, almost everyone. I heard her enchanting laugh again and I was pulled to my feet and folded into the arms of someone else, in a huge bear hug.

"Emmett! Same goes for you! No killing the woman I love!" Jasper yelled, I felt Emmett's chest rumble with laughter as he put me back down. "Well, hey there little sister." He said and smiled at me.

"Um…Hi." I said nervously.

"See Emmett you and your huge self are going to scare her away." Jasper said and I immediately felt him pull me into his arms.

"No. I don't agree. She can't be part of our family. No. Never." Edward said shaking his head.

"I agree with Edward, she shouldn't be turned." Rosalie said, shocker there.

"Well seeing as there's 8 people here who's votes matter, and 1, 2, 3, 4, 5…and 6 including myself have all vote yes, and 2 have voted no, it seems that you two lose." Carlisle said.

Edward let out a roar of fury and stormed upstairs.

Alice turned to me and bit her lip. "I better go check on him. He gets like this sometimes. I'm really happy to have another sister Bella, believe me." She said hugging me again then bolting up the stairs.

"Well…let's all discuss this without the emo one shall we?" Emmett said and Rosalie smacked him in the back of the head. I liked him, he was funny.

"Guys…I'd…love to stay and chat all night about this, but seeing how I need sleep, and my father is home, I should get back before he gets worried." I said

"Right, human need to sleep, right, almost forgot." Jasper said getting up.

"Where are you going?" I asked him as he joined me at the door.

"You didn't think I'd make you _walk_ home did you?" He asked. "Never mind do not even answer that." He said shaking his head, just as Alice was bounding back down the stairs.

"Big dofus won't even talk to me." She said annoyed. The spotted me and Jasper at the door. "You're leaving Bella?" She asked amazed.

"Yeah, sorry, I have to cook my dad dinner and such." I said giving her a hug, for the first time with my consent. Esme appeared at her side, giving me a hug also.

"Come back tomorrow, dear." She said with a smile.

"I will." I promised, then Jasper scooped me up in his arms, and I couldn't help but blush.

"See you in a bit." He said over his shoulder to his mother.

She nodded and we took off through the forest.

He took us to the school where my new sweet red Mitsubishi Eclipse was sitting, and I smile in spite of myself. I couldn't wait to drive it.

So I'll see you at school tomorrow." I said as I slipped my keys into the drivers' side door unlocking it. I lingered there for a minute with my back to Jasper and the keys in the unlocked door.

I turned slowly to see Jasper staring at me intently. He closed to distance between us, and wrapped one of his arms around my back, and the other hand rest on my cheek. For a moment we just stared into each others eyes, his topaz meeting my brown.

I wasn't surprised when his lips came down to meet mine, it was a sweet kiss, light, it was a promise. A promise to love each other, a promise to be there for each other, and a promise that we'd never part.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that." He said.

"I love you." He whispered in my ear making me shiver, then he was gone.

Tomorrow came, whether I willed it to or not. I'd have to straighten things out with Chase when Music class came. From what I heard from Jasper and Alice both is that since spring break was coming up I'd have to plan a trip back home to Phoenix to stage my death.

Creepy, right?

But I would rather not die, and I really care for Jasper, and those feelings for him were increasing every time I saw him, we both could feel it.

Then it came.

Doom.

Music Class.

I walk into the room followed by Jasper who keeps his distance. His family has turned in withdrawal papers from this school. Mostly because if we left at the same time it would seem like they had something to do with my "death" oh, if they only knew. It was amazing how little this bothered me.

"Bella…we need to talk." Chase surprised me by saying when I reached him in the room.

"O…k." I said, and he took me by the hand and lead me into the sound room before class started.

"Bella, I really like you, I do. But with my mother in the hospital, it's not fair of me to have you stressed over this too. It's not fair to either of us, to be honest. I care for you, I always will but…I can't do this right now." He said looking at me hopefully.

"Stupid." I said rolling my eyes and pulling him into a hug. "I get it, Chase, and I respect that. I hope you know I'll always be here if you need me." _Lie. _"We can still be friends, no need for weirdness." I said with a smile. Part of me was sad to give him up, the other side surprised that this was coming no matter what.

"Of course. You're right, Bella. You're a great friend and I'd hate to loose you." He said.

At least we could still be friends. We both made our way back to the music room with smiles on our faces.

Jasper seemed to understand and gave me a smile. I peeked back at Edward who was in the far back behind Conner's drums leaning against the wall with a scowl on his face, his face flashed to mine and I swear I heard him growl. Wait a minute, he probably did.

I just shrugged and turned around.

"Bella Swan, if you are feeling any better you still have a song to sing for us today, any of your choice."

"You don't have to sing to one you wrote me, Bella. Just go up there and do your best I believe in you." Chase said and he squeezed my hand.

"Thanks." I said, because there was another song that I wanted to sing very badly. I made my way up to stage, prepared to sign the song that I had wrote last night. One that I had filled Jasper, Conner, Chase, and had Jasper fill Edward in on. I didn't want to sing alone anymore, I was ready for the band

I nodded to them and we all walked onto stage, except for Edward, there was no piano in this song, but I swore to get a song with some piano in it before we all "leave" The fact that I would be performing with the band seemed to surprise the teacher, and even more surprise the students.

Chase stared off the beat with the drums, and Conner, and Jasper joined in with the guitars. Then I started singing.

"_Turn around there's those eyes again.  
Turn around fake indifference and I.  
Watch their cold, dark silhouettes disappear."_

**It seemed like every time I turned around something changes. **

_  
"A hundred bodies fill this room.  
And all their faces overdone.  
Pain is foreign, foreign to us. "_

**Looking at all these kids standing in here watching me sing not knowing what else lay out there, just oblivious, it made me think. **

_  
"I don't even know you.  
You won't even know I'm gone.  
Was it something I did wrong?"  
_

**Half of these people don't even know me, they don't know the real me, none of them, and after a while, after I'm gone, they won't care. What did I do to deserve their silence?**

_  
"Roses, roses cold.  
Roses, roses sold out."_

**Roses symbolize love to me, love for many seemed to be so cold, and real love seems to be sold out and unattainable, at least I get the chance. **

_"Turn around reds and whites again.  
I'd sell my kicks for one more low tar.  
Fevers hand in hand with shoelace bracelets."_

**I had to include Angela in this, and our kicking shoelace bracelets we made together the other weekend, I saw her smile at me, and I knew she caught it. **

"_Why are some girls so naive?  
He didn't unbutton your blouse to see.  
A better view of your heart.  
Oh yeah, can't blame you for trying. "  
_

**Jessica wasn't bad, this verse I had wrote for her, I liked Jess, no matter what you say, she just wanted to guy she liked to like her, and she let his take advantage of her, it pissed me off. **

_  
"I don't even know you.  
You won't even know I'm gone.  
Was it something I did wrong?_

_Roses, roses cold.  
Roses, roses sold out._

_Sing it soft.  
Make it slow.  
Apples parachute  
the boys back down.  
Fill it up.  
Overflow.  
A new, improved modern way to feel._

_I don't even know you.  
You won't even know I'm gone.  
Was it something I did wrong?"_

I was done finally. I smiled at everyone and took a bow and hopped from the stage.

"Very nice again today Bella, can't wait to hear tomorrow's." Mrs. Levinski said. For the rest of class I just listened to everyone else sing for the day. Knowing I'd go back to the Cullen's tonight to talk with them as I had promised.

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First update in a while, I know, hope you liked it. I've been busy, there's some family and friend stuff going on right now so bear with me.

**Love **

**Me. **

**Review or I'll have no incentive to write more. **


	14. Lies

As I was walking out the school, someone grabbed me from behind and I wrapped their arms around my waist. I felt that their touch was cool, and I knew it had to be Jasper.

"Hey Jasper, um…can you not fly off with me today, I think I prefer driving." I said laughing.

"Aw, but that takes all the fun out of it."

"I never said I was in the mood for fun now did I?" I said and I felt him laugh.

"I suppose not. Well we can drive." He said and he took my hand and began pulling me towards Emmett's Jeep.

"J-Jasper, I have my car here today, s-so I can drive myself." I said looking longingly at my beautiful Mitsubishi Eclipse.

"Come on, there's plenty of room in the Jeep, it seats five comfortably, and only four of us will be in it, so it's ok." He said.

"Only…four?" said mostly to myself.

"Well yeah, Alice and Edward are going home in Edwards Volvo." He said inclining his head to the space next to the Jeep where, sure enough, Alice and Edward were climbing into the silver Volvo.

"Bu-But Jasper my car's here, I can't just leave it, I shouldn't, I won't." I said pulling at his grasp. This was my new freaking car we're talking about here, no way was I leaving it.

"Come on, it's quicker if we all go together." He said

I knew he could still feel my unease, because he added. "Don't worry, I'll run you back out to it, and we can both drive it back to your house later, I don't think it'll be in any harm if you keep the keys with you." He said.

"Right." I nodded.

"Bella, there's my favorite sister." Emmett said.

"Hey, isn't that me?!" I heard Alice yell from the Volvo as I climbed into the Jeep trying my hardest to avoid Edwards' gaze, if he was watching.

"Well, you used to be my only sister, but Bella's far more interesting, wouldn't you agree Jasper?" Emmett asked him looking at him through the review mirror.

"Totally." Jasper said looking down at me his topaz eyes smoldering me.

"No fair! He's biased!" Alice said. "Well, I guess their not wrong." She added. We all pulled out, and I stared sadly at my car that was growing smaller and smaller the further away we got.

We pulled out in front of the Volvo, so it was hard for me to feel comfortable when all I could think about was Edwards' eyes, and how they were probably shooting bullets at my head right now.

Nevertheless we pulled up to the Cullen mansion and we all scrambled out of the cars, well I scrambled, I noticed everyone else got out with grace.

"Come on Bells, let's go." Jasper said wrapping an arm around my waist.

"Shit." I hissed then covered my mouth, everyone stopped and looked at me, and I blushed.

"What's wrong?" Jasper asked concerned.

"Charlie, I forgot to tell him." I said hurriedly. He frowned and pulled me towards to door. "You can use our phone." He said and I nodded.

The door opened before we got to it, and Esme was standing in it, and she greeted me with a hug, and Carlisle was to her right and he offered me a big smile.

"Hi." I said.

"Mom, Dad, Bella need's to use the phone." Jasper said pulling me into the house, and towards probably the only phone the Cullen's have.

My hands were shaking, and I didn't realize how nervous I was about telling him where I was until he answered it and I heard my own voice.

"Swan residence." Came his voice.

"D-dad! Hi, it's me." I said my voice shaking.

"Bella?! What's wrong?" He asked.

"N-nothing's wrong, I promise. I'm just over at a friends' house tonight and I'll be back a little later." I said, I hadn't even told him about going to Phoenix on Friday. Add that to my to-do list.

"Over at a friends' house? Great. Wait, which friends?" He asked, what a smart daddy. When it came down to it, I realized that I couldn't tell him that I was at the Cullen's, because then when I disappeared they might be in trouble for leaving at the same time…I needed to think up a lie, and quick.

"I'm…I'm at Angela's house, I'm staying for dinner too, I have my car, I'll be home a little late. I put dinner in the fridge this morning, fish, just heat it up." I said and waited.

"On a school night?" He asked after a moment.

"We're going to do our homework before dinner." I said awkwardly, I really didn't like lying in front of them, but they were all smiling, not funny I hated lying to my father. "I'll see you later, k dad?" I asked.

"Alright honey, I love you." He said.

"Love you too." I said and hung up the phone.

"Wow, Bella, that was terrible I don't know how he believed you." Emmett said laughing and I rolled my eyes as I picked up the phone again.

Jasper gave me a questioning look.

"Might as well cover all the bases." I said as I punched in Angela's number.

She picked up on the 3rd right.

"Hey Ang, hi it's me." I said.

"Oh, hey Bella! What's up, want to hang out tonight?" She asked. _Wow how ironic. _I thought and I saw Emmett trying hard not to laugh.

"Sorry I can't, but I was wondering if you could do me a favor." I said and wait for her response.

"Sure anything Bells." She said.

"Alright, I'm kind of caught up in something, and if my dad calls your house can you say I'm like in the bathroom or something?" I asked.

"Sure Bells…but can I ask you what's going on?" She said.

"You can, but I can't really talk right now, I'll explain later, I owe you big time!" I said.

"Yeah, I know. Alright well, I'll talk to you later Bella." She said.

"You too Ang." I said and hung up the phone and turned to Jasper and his family.

"I guess I'm not done lying either." I said miserably.

Jasper wrapped his arms around me tightly, and held me.

"It'll be alright love, I'm here." He said, and I melted into his arms.

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Review or I'm done.

**Cold Turkey. **

**Or something like that. **

**THANKX**

**REVIEW!!!**


	15. Sound Booth

**Forgive me in the most extreme way there possibly could be. Here is the new chapter please do not kill me!!!!**

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RECAP

"_Sure Bells…but can I ask you what's going on?" She said. _

"_You can, but I can't really talk right now, I'll explain later, I owe you big time!" I said. _

"_Yeah, I know. Alright well, I'll talk to you later Bella." She said. _

"_You too Ang." I said and hung up the phone and turned to Jasper and his family. _

"_I guess I'm not done lying either." I said miserably. _

_Jasper wrapped his arms around me tightly, and held me. _

"_It'll be alright love, I'm here." He said, and I melted into his arms. _

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"Jasper can you take me home?" I asked him, partly because I was practically passing out on his couch, and also because Edward kept on glaring at me from across the living room**. **

"Um…sure Bella, give me a minute, I need to go talk to Carlisle." He said rising from his spot next to me and then placing a kiss on my forehead. I looked around the room after Jasper and Carlisle left. To my pure shock, and discomfort only Edward and I were left in the Cullen living room.

It was a long awkward silence until Edward, yes Edward actually started talking.

"So you like to sing?" He asked looking off in another direction. I was so startled by his sudden speech that I jumped a little.

"Y-yes." I answered. He suddenly got up and looked at me. "Come on, we have a studio in here, Jasper's going to be a while, so…I thought…" He looked back at me with a strained expression.

"Say no more, you had me at the word 'studio'." I said smiling. And he led me down a few long hallways before opening one of the last doors in one of the last hallways I thought could possibly fit in his house.

Ok, so one word. Amazing. This studio had everything complete with the glass window and mic, and speakers and all the buttons that I have no idea what they do. I was almost giddy, and I could see Edward crack a small half smile out of the corner of my eye.

"Alright so…go on ahead." He said smirking.

"Oh, no, no, no, no! You first, I can't sing first, nuh uh no way!" I said pushing him into the sound booth, I could tell he didn't want to but once he was in there…it was like he was another person. He smiled and was motioning for me to flip a switch on the front panel, luckily I must have found it cause I could hear Edwards voice now.

"Switch over to song number 4, you do see the flashing red numbers right?" He said, and I rolled my eyes.

"Yes, I can see Edward." I said and pressed to arrow and got to the number four.

"Well, you never know." He said smiling.

"Whatever, just get on with it." I said gesturing to the microphone in front of him and he nodded and I pressed play. Then his voice filled the room, and I sat down on one of the padded chairs and watched him.

"_I shouldn't love you but I want to  
__I just can't turn away  
__I shouldn't see you but can't move  
__I can't look away  
__I shouldn't love you but I want to  
__I just can't turn away  
__I shouldn't see you but can't move  
__I can't look away"_

**I stared at him in shock, his voice was amazing when he wanted it to be, it sounded to sweet, and controlled, very not Edward, but I liked it. **

"_And I don't know  
__How to be fine when I'm not  
__Cause I don't know  
__How to make a feeling stop  
__Just so you know  
__This feelings taking control of me  
__And I can't help it  
__I won't sit around I can't let him win now  
__Thought you should know  
__I've tried my best to let go of you, but I don't want to  
__Just gotta say it all before I go  
__Just so you know"_

**He smiled at me, then his face turned serious again, as he continued singing. **

"_It's getting hard to be around you  
__There's so much I can't say  
__Do you want me to have the feelings  
__And look to other way  
__And I don't know  
__How to be fine when I'm not  
__Cause I don't know  
__How to make a feeling stop  
__  
Just so you know  
__This feelings taking control of me  
__And I can't help it  
__I won't sit around I can't let him win now  
__Thought you should know  
__I've tried my best to let go of you, but I don't want to  
__Just gotta say it all before I go  
__Just so you know  
__This emptiness is killing me  
__And I'm wondering why I waited so long  
__Looking back I realize  
__It was always there just never spoken  
__I'm waiting here  
__Been waiting here"_

**Then his face snapped up to mine and our eyes met, and he didn't look away as he sang, and I felt the blush rise on my cheeks. **

"_Just so you know  
__This feelings taking control of me  
__And I can't help it  
__I won't sit around I can't let him win now  
__Thought you should know  
__I've tried my best to let go of you, but I don't want to  
__Just gotta say it all before I go  
__Just so you know  
__  
Whoa…  
__Just so you know.  
__Whoa…  
__Thought you should know  
__I've tried my best to let go of you, but I don't want to  
__Just gotta say it all before I go  
__Just so you know  
__Just so you know  
__Just so you know"_

He walked out of the sound booth and smiled at me wickedly. "Your turn." He said pushing me into the booth and shutting the door.

"Alright, alright, alright, I left my CD in there just go to number 8 and I'll show you have it's done." I said.

"I think I have a bit more experience than you." He said seriously.

"Experience is nothing when compared to sheer talent." I said smiling, now press the button."

_"Nobody believes me when I tell'em that you're out of your mind  
__Nobody believes me when I tell'em there's so much you hide  
__You treat me like a queen when we go out  
__Wanna show everyone what our loves about  
__All wrapped up in me whenever there is a crowd  
__But when no one's around…_

_There's no kindness in your eyes  
__The way you look at me it's just not right  
__I can tell what's going on this time  
__There's a stranger in my life  
__You're not the person that I once knew  
__Are you scared to let them know it's you?  
__If they could only see you like I do  
__Then they would see a stranger too"_

**He looked at me curiously, and I looked down and continued singing. I couldn't stand his stare. Yeah this was about Edward and how he only showed his true and aggressive side to me when we were alone, but silent and perfect when there were people around.**

"_Did I ever do anything that was this cruel to you?  
__Did I ever make you wonder who was standing in the room?  
__You made yourself look perfect in everyway  
__So when this goes down I'm the one who will be blamed  
__The plan is working so you can just walk away  
__Baby your secrets safe…"_

**I looked him right in the eye.**

"_There's no kindness in your eyes  
__The way you look at me it's just not right  
__I can tell what's going on this time  
__There's a stranger in my life  
__You're not the person that I once knew  
__Are you scared to let them know it's you?  
__If they could only see you like I do  
__Then they would see a stranger too  
__Such a long way back from this place that we are at  
__When I think of all the time I've wasted I could cry_

_There's no kindness in your eyes  
__The way you look at me it's just not right  
__I can tell what's going on this time  
__There's a stranger in my life  
__You're not the person that I once knew  
__Are you scared to let them know it's you?  
__If they could only see you like I do  
__Then they would see a stranger too"_

**There was a long break in the music, which only left time for more eye contact, he tilted his head to the side and I looked away awkwardly, so when the music picked back up I was relieved. **

"_There's no kindness in your eyes  
__The way you look at me it's just not right  
__I can tell what's going on this time  
__There's a stranger in my life  
__You're not the person that I once knew  
__Are you scared to let them know it's you?  
__If they could only see you like I do  
__Then they would see a stranger to"_

I went to get out of the booth but Edward was holding the door shut. "One more." He said seriously.

"Aw, come on just let me out of here!" I whined.

"Nope, come on just one more. Try something slower, something to bring out your voice more." He said.

I sighed and walked over to the microphone.

"The only kind of deep voiced song I have is number 10 but you can't laugh at me!" I warned.

"I wouldn't think of it." Then he paused. "Okay maybe I would think about it, but I never really would." He said smiling.

"Whatever just play the song so we can end the song fest." I laughed.

"As you wish." He said and he pressed play, cause the music started flowing. I closed my eyes and took a breath.

_"Don't know much about your life  
__Don't know much about your world  
__But don't want to be alone tonight  
__On this planet they call earth  
__You don't about my past  
__And I don't have a future figured out  
__And maybe this is going too fast  
__And maybe it's not meant to last_

_What do you say to taking chances?  
__What do you say to jumping off the edge?  
__Never knowing if there's solid ground below,  
__A hand to hold, or hell to pay  
__What do you say?  
__What do you say?_

_I just want to start again  
__And maybe you could to show me how to try  
__And maybe you could take me in  
__Somewhere underneath your skin!_

_What do you say to taking chances?  
__What do you say to jumping off the edge?  
__Never knowing if there's solid ground below  
__A hand to hold, or hell to pay  
__What do you say?  
__What do you say?_

_Uh huh, I get beaten down  
__But I always come back for more  
__There's nothing like love to pull you up  
__When you lying down on the floor_

_So talk to me, talk to me  
__Like lovers do  
__Yeah, walk with me, walk with me  
__Like lovers do  
__Like lovers do_

_What do you say to taking chances?  
__What do you say to jumping off the edge?  
__Never knowing if there's solid ground below  
__A hand to hold, or hell to pay  
__What do you say?  
__What do you say?_

_Don't know much about your life  
__And I don't know much about your world" _

This time I ran out of the booth before he could trap me in again but he was still staring into the booth and not looking at me. So I started to get a bit worried after a few minutes had passed so I poked his shoulder.

"Uh, Edward, I'm done." I said laughing. And his eyes flashed up to me.

"That was amazing." He said. I couldn't help blushing.

Quicker than I realized Edward was up and standing right in front of me with his topaz eyes boring into mine. I took a quick step back, and he smirked.

In reality I wasn't that far from him, he was right, right in front of me before I had taken my step back, so…I guess we really weren't that far away anyway.

He reached his hand out and brushed my cheek with his thumb. "You're amazing." He breathed, and his breath hit me like a mack truck, sweet, and delicious almost causing me drool, but Jaspers was the same way I suppose.

WAIT! JASPER!

I snapped out of my moment of insanity real fast after that. I bolted out of the studio door without a second glance backward, and down the hallways as quick as I could, desperately trying to find the living room.

Needless to say by the time I reached the living room Jasper was already there waiting for me. Ah, Emmett was there too.

"Bella!" Emmett boomed jumping off the couch he was sitting on and scooping me up into a huge tight hug. "Well I'm glad you're okay with our little secret, but let's keep it a secret, right?" He said smiling and he put me down and I stumbled a bit and ran right into something hard. I looked up and saw Jaspers amused face. He was enjoying my confusedness.

I stuck my tongue out at him, but he only pulled me into another sweet hug. And I smiled against his shoulder.

I heard a muffled pair of shoes slumping into the room, and turned my head a little bit to see Edward rounding the corner from the hallway that entered into the living room. His eyes skipped past me and landed on Jasper, I really couldn't make out his expression, I wonder if it was one that Jasper and his family saw often.

In that moment Alice came flying down the stair and slapped Edward right across the face. It was the most random and strange thing that I ever saw. Then she just walked away leaving Edward to stare after her.

"Whoa, what was that about?" Emmett said looking at Edward, but Edward just sighed and shook his head, and his eyes flashed to me. Instinctively I cringed back from his glare and into Jaspers chest, he just shook his head and walked off somewhere else in the house.

"How about you take me home now Jasper?" I said quietly.

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	16. Playlist For The Story So Far

**SONGS THAT ARE USED IN MY STORY**

They are listed in the order that they appear in my story.

**Posted for the request of:** Unknown Psuedonym

1. Born For This – Paramore  
2. Get Over It – Avril Lavigne  
3. He Wasn't – Avril Lavigne  
4. Perfect Scene – Mercy Mercedes  
5. When She Cries – Britt Nicole  
6. 30 Minutes – TaTu  
7. Innocence – Avril Lavigne  
8. Conspiracy – Paramore  
9. Absolute – Thousand Foot Krutch  
10. Forgotten – Avril Lavignes  
11. Get Over It – Avril Lavigne  
12. Should've Said No – Taylor Swift  
13. Breaking The Habit – Breaking Benjamin  
14. Check Yes Juliet – We The Kings  
15. The Edge – Tokio Hotel  
16. Supernatural – Flyleaf  
17. Roses – Meg and Dia  
18. Just So You Know – Jesses McCartney  
19. Stranger – Hilary Duff  
20. Taking Chances – Celine Dion

**Enjoy! **


	17. plz, i need your help

**I'm sorry this is a new chapter i'm a bad liar i'm so sorry! but there is a poll on my profile plz read this and answer it and let me know if i should write this**

**Vote on this, Yea or Nay as to if I should write this story or not. I'll give you a brief overview of what I want to story to be about but you have to let me know if you would read it or not.**

**=) Let me know**

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Edward leaves in New Moon along with the rest of his family in order to protect Bella from the harm his family brings her by being near her. Bella takes everything that Edward said about him not loving her seriously and she spends a lot of time be depressed and cutting herself off from the rest of the world. But a new boy named Damion Luvaldi moves to Forks and into Bella's life. He takes on the role of an all around nice guy to everyone in school, but Bella always seems to catch his true self when he's being arrogant and rude. He takes a rather quick and keen interest in Bella, but she doesn't want to have anything to do with his two faced character.

The absence of love in her life is apparent trough her eyes, but could Damion be the guy to change her? Or would his efforts to be with her only bring her misery and sadness. But regardless of how much Bella finds Damion detestable she can't deny that being around him made her day better because whenever she is near him all the pain in her heart disappears. It's a funny feeling that only happens for Bella when she is near this blonde-haired red-eyed beauty.

Could Damions species be similar to that of the man that broke her heart? The ides and possibility that Damion could be an immortal doesn't seem too impossible for her to entertain. The possibility of this is another major thing that keeps her from Damion, but also makes her want to keep a closer eye on him. But she can never forget about her first love and she can't help but to wish that he would come back.

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Tell me what you think? This is just a brief summary and I promise that the real thing would be oh so much better =/. Let me know please!

Review pls pls pls pls!!!!!!


	18. Trouble In Paradise

**I'm so so so soooooooo sorry for the wait that i've had to make everyone suffer thruogh, but all my classes are getting really tough right now and i've been hitting the books. But i thought you guys deserved this so here it is. The Next Chapter. I made is a long one just for you. **

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BPOV

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"Jasper are you sure that Edward and Alice are okay?" I asked him for to hundredth time today. He smiled crookedly and gently squeezed my hand.

"I'm sure that they will be fine." He said as he pulled his car into the schools driveway. I looked around the parking lot for other traces of the Cullen's, but for the first time they weren't sticking out of the crowd.

I noticed that t hey were scattered about the parking lot Rosalie was standing off next to Rosalie's' red BMW M3 convertible deep into conversation. This really worried me because Emmett and Rose were rarely serious while talking, but then Rose hit Emmett over the head and I breathed a sigh of relief. Apparently things weren't as bas as I thought they were.

Alice was standing not to far away from Rosalie and Emmett getting involved into their conversation from time to time but otherwise staying silent. My eyes roamed the parking lot searching for Edward, but when my eyes found him I was wishing that I didn't. He was leaning on the door of his silver Volvo looking directly at me.

I felt the red raise to my cheeks and I ducted my head; clinging onto Jaspers on tighter. I peeked back up at him to see that his eyes had never left me, even worse now they were filled with jealousy and rage.

"Just ignore him." Jasper whispered in my ear making me jump up in surprise.

"I'm sorry." I muttered bowing my head again.

"What are you apologizing for?" He asked.

"It's just…I feel like this is my fault." I could feel the tears build up in my eyes with each word that I spoke.

Before I knew it Jasper was standing in front of me with his hands on both of my shoulders looking me directly in the eye.

"It's not your fault Bella. Edward did this to himself, it's not your fault." He said seriously. "Tell me that it's not your fault."

I looked up at him, knowing that what he was saying was true, but somehow not being able to say the words. I know that I didn't take any action on purpose to cause what had happened, but I somehow knew that this was my fault. Edward didn't like me, he didn't want me in his family, I know that, but I never realized that he hated me this much.

"Bella. Say it." Jasper said gritting his teeth.

"It's not my fault." I sighed, and I saw that the air from my breath blow his hair back. Then everything happened so quickly. Jasper's eyes dilated and he took a quick staggering step backwards from me, and out of no where I was crushed in a pair of cold marble arms that knocked the breath out of me.  
I gasped as I was hit by an unknown force, and fell forward onto the cold ground, but I landed on top of something cold and marble-like, this didn't feel like the ground. I opened my eyes slowly to see a pale tan shirt under me.

"Um…" Came the musical voice from the person that was blocking me from the ground. I looked up slowly to see a pair of beautiful topaz eyes. My eyes refocused to see the big picture that was going on. Edward had tackled me, and now I was laying on top of him…God I was so stupid.

I quickly scrambled up from him and stood brushing myself off. I turned quickly to see Rose, Alice and Emmett all surrounding Jasper, I took two quick steps toward them when I was pulled back again.

"Ak! Edward let me go!" I screamed.

"No! Stay away from me Bella." Jasper said doubling over clenching his throat. "Edward…get her out of her, now." Jasper begged.

Edward didn't move an inch. Would he really listen to his brother? After they've fought all this time would he be able to take this simple command? It seemed that no matter what Jasper said Edward just didn't want to listen to him. He wanted Jasper to get his punishment for letting me know of this world, and he'd get it too.

Right now Jasper was spazzing over my scent, and it wouldn't take much for him to just blast through his siblings and off me. That would be the punishment of a human who learned about this world. I was going to die.

"Please!" Jasper said again dodging towards us but Emmett took a quick step towards him and landed a strong punch right to his gut, I could only imagine the pain that it held and I winced along with him.

"Dammit." Edward hissed under his breath. "I told him this would happen."

"Edward! Godammit, why are you still standing there, just go!" Emmett yelled at him, and with that everything changed. No matter how much Edward wanted to deny a request from Jasper, he couldn't do the same thing to Emmett.

"Fine!" he yelled and scooped me up into his arms.

"Hey! Wait! Put me down!" I screamed struggling.

"Quiet! If you go back there you'll be Jaspers' breakfast, you want that then go, if not then just be quiet and enjoy the ride." Edward growled.

"Fine." I hissed back at him.

"You might want to close your eyes, the speed might be a bit much for a human to handle, and plus I really like this shirt and I don't want you getting sick on it."

I obeyed quickly, and closed my eyes as her darted off with my in his arms. From the direction that he took us we were running through the forest that was behind the school. It seemed like it was only seconds before he stopped running and dumped me onto the soft grassy ground.

"Ow!" I complained glaring up at him.

He just huffed and walked away. It was then that I realized where he had brought us. We were in the same meadow that we had had our not so nice meeting in. The time when he told me to stay away from Jasper. Maybe I should have listened to him at the time.

I sighed and laid back on the cold grass of the meadow and stared up at the sky. A lot has happened since that day, so much. Jasper and I were together now, and because of that there was a definite line between the Cullen's in the family. Those who opposed my being changed, which only consisted of Edward and Rosalie volleyed together against the ones that opposed what was pretty much everyone else.

Landon had come back and was proclaiming his love for me, but at the same time he was a jerk. After what he had done to me in the music room in the school I had lost all hope in him. He was my past, and Jasper was my future.

Then there was Edward, the quiet, yet angry one. He was so mean to me at first, and I guess he still is now, probably more so than before. But at times he can try to be sweet in his own way, but he's still a vampire, and he's sneaky in ways that I can't even imagine and I have to always be wary of him. But still at the same time I get the feeling that he cares for me, and wants me to be happy. But the mixed signals keep piling up. One minute he's kissing me by force in the sound room at school and the next he's saying it would be better for me to die rather than be changed to avoid death.

I looked up and stole a quick look around the field for him and found him not too far away from me staring at me intently with his golden topaz eyes. There was something that seemed to be annoying him, well it was probably just my presence overall, but he could at least try to hide it in public. I rolled my eyes and looked away from him, I didn't need his anger right now.

"Why?" I heard his say, barely audible over the sounds of the tress.

"Why, what?" I repeated tiredly.

He laughed once without humor. "I'm not too sure, there are just so many questions that I want to ask 'why' to that I'm not even sure where to start to get my answers." He said running a hand through his untidy bronze hair.

I laughed once as well and looked back at him. 'Who said that you would get answers in the first place?" I asked raising an eyebrow.

He sighed and sat down cross legged in the grass. "You know I usually don't have to bother with asking people questions. I usually can just get the answers on my own."

"Oh and how exactly would you get answers without people telling you?"

"You mean Jasper hasn't told you about my ability?" He asked the subject obviously peeking his interest.

"Oh! You mean your psychic-ball-see-into-peoples-minds thing. I don't know he might have mentioned it." I said with a sly half smile.

He replied with a half smile of his own and scooted a bit closer to me.

"Okay, so he did mention it." He said laughing.

"Uh huh, but I think that's a little unfair. Peoples secrets should remain their own, what right do you have to just take everything they know from them?" I asked.

"Well in the first place, they shouldn't be hiding anything from me anyway, and if they are then I think it's better for me to know, and secondly, it's not like they ever know I'm doing it." He said giving that same crooked half smile again.

Horror sunk in as I realized this. He could probably hear everything that I'm thinking. My eyes darted back up to him in an instant and he just started laughing.

"You have nothing to worry about, Bella." He said the smile fading from his face. "I can't read your mind."

"Really, well I'm safe then." I said laughing.

"Oh? So you're hiding something from me?" He asked taking another scoot closer to me. He was really close now, I could probably reach out from where I was laying on the ground and touch his nose, even though I wouldn't.

"No, I'm not particularly hiding anything from you. Just a good thing that you can't be in my mind, it's probably even for your benefit." I said with a laugh.

"Oh, and why would it benefit me?" He asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well, I get the feeling that my mind would just bore you to death anyway."

His eyes bore into mine with an intensity that I've never seen before. "I don't find anything about you boring, Bella." He leaned down into my face, inching closer and closer into me. My heart started beating a thousand miles a minute and he smiled when he saw the red rise into my cheeks.

Quickly my hands darted forward and I pushed him back away from me and sat up.

"You need to stop doing that." I said in a serious tone looking him.

He just stared back at me in shock like he hadn't realized that he was inching in that close, but I knew how alert vampires were, and I knew how smart Edward was in particular, I wasn't about to be fooled.

"I'm sorry…I didn't realize." He said not moving an inch from where I had pushed him.

"Sure." I said stretching out the word and rolling my eyes. He smirked and sat back down on the grass, yeah he knew I had him pegged.

"I hope Jasper's okay." I said looking out at the trees and woods across the clearing.

He grunted in response, and looked away. I got back up and began to walk circles around the open meadow just thinking. Why did Edward always feel the need to interfere in mine and Jasper's relationship? I shook my head and kicked a rock across the grass.

Then I heard it, there was talking on the other side of the clearing, I looked over and saw Jasper and Emmett talking to Edward. I broke into a run and made my way over to the guys, I was happy that Jasper was okay, and he looked like he was calmer than before.

"Jasper are you okay?" I asked placing my hand on his forearm. He didn't show any signs of the animal he had become before so I took that as my answer and sighed in relief.

"I'm fine Bella. I'm so sorry." He said pulling me to him and holding me to him. "I really should have better control what I did was unforgivable."

"It's not your fault." I said trying to pull away to look him in the eyes, but he was holding me to him too tight.

"Edward was right, I don't have any self control. I'm afriad that I'm going to hurt you Bella." He whispered into my hair. Why was he telling me this now? We already knew the riskes of us being together, why was he bringing it up now?

He hugged me to him tighlty before releasing me again looking down into my eyes. "I'm not going to be the one who kills you Bella. I won't do that to you."

"You're not going to-"

"Bella, I'm dangerous for you, that's undeniable." His solf golden eyes looked at me with so much pain. No, I didn't want it to end like this, I didn't want to lose him, I wasn't going to lose him.

"Then change me." I said staring back at him.

"What?" He asked slightly taken aback.

"If you're so scared of hurting me, then change me, do it. Now." I said seriously, and for the first time I was indecision flick through Jaspers eyes.

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	19. New Beginnings

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**Hey Everyone!**

**_

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_**

**_Sorry about the wait._**

For all of you that read my 5 stories…:

**Music of the Heart**

**Falling Down and Getting Up**

**The Bella I Am Now**

**I Don't Deserve This**

~ and ~

**The New Guy Is a Vampire**

I really don't have an excuse for all the lateness and no updates besides the fact that I'm just lazy and I've had writers block horribly.

BUT!

There is a horizon~ I intend to start writing again. And if I don't start writing to the story you are reading right now then read my other stories I promise you they are all as good as I could hope and you'll like them.

**I'm also starting a new story I haven't worked everything out but you can bet you'll see it soon.**

**Thank you, for being patient.**

Love!

**Lynn**


	20. Songs From The Heart

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**Sorry! So SORRY for the wait. Heres the new chapter. There is a huge twist in this one and you won't expect it but dont kill my for it. **

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"_Edward was right, I don't have any self control. I'm afraid that I'm going to hurt you Bella." He whispered into my hair. Why was he telling me this now? We already knew the risks of us being together, why was he bringing it up now?_

_He hugged me to him tightly before releasing me again looking down into my eyes. "I'm not going to be the one who kills you Bella. I won't do that to you."_

"_You're not going to-"_

"_Bella, I'm dangerous for you, that's undeniable." His soft golden eyes looked at me with so much pain. No, I didn't want it to end like this, I didn't want to lose him, and I wasn't going to lose him._

"_Then change me." I said staring back at him._

"_What?" He asked slightly taken aback._

"_If you're so scared of hurting me, then change me, do it. Now." I said seriously, and for the first time I was indecision flick through Jaspers eyes._

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"What? What's the problem? Just one simple bite, and three days can solve all this! I don't understand why you are waiting for me to get older! I could die any minute, every second that ticks by I get older and closer to death, doesn't that mean anything to you?!" I half yelled at Jasper and I saw him cringe.

"Of course it means something to me!" he shot back hurt in his voice.

"Really? It doesn't seem like it." I said looking away from him and blinking fast to keep the tears from falling.

"Bella…please don't do this." He begged.

"Do what?" I choked out still not looking at him.

"Make me do this." He breathed into my ear from behind me. I shivered when he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck.

"It's what I want." I said strongly as I could with my voice shaking. His cool breath on my neck was enough to make my legs quiver and my mind to go blank but I held it together as best I could.

"Are you sure." He whispered against my neck and I felt goose bumps take over my entire body.

"Yes…I'm sure." I said closing my eyes.

"…Wait…" I heard him whisper almost to himself. "…wait.." he said again to himself pulling away from me. "If we're going to do this we need to at least do it right." He said softly turning my around and kissing my forehead.

"How do we do that?" I asked skeptically.

"We need to talk to my family, it's their lives too." He said carefully and I nodded.

Swiftly he scooped me up in his arms and he took off. Edward was there too and he effortlessly caught up to us, he was a fast runner. I heard the stirring of wind as he breezed past us and kept on going, and I wondered if he was upset.

We reached Jasper's house quickly and he set me down in the living room and kissed my forehead. "Just wait here I'm going to talk with my family and then I'll tell you the decision." He whispered and I nodded, and he took off.

I sighed bored, and decided time would fly faster if I was singing, so I headed to their sound room but I already heard music playing and a voice coming from the room. It was Edward! His voice was a lot cooler than usual, and it was softer and…it was just soo good.

_**[Link To The Song On My Profile**__**]**_

_If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?  
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?  
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call  
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all_

I'll never know what the future brings  
But I know you're here with me now  
We'll make it through  
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

**His voice sounded so sad and tired…I've never heard him like this before.**

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?  
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?  
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?  
If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?  
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

**I sat down against the wall and kept as quiet as I could and just closed my eyes and listened to him sing.**

_  
I don't know why you're so far away  
But I know that this much is true  
We'll make it through  
And I hope you are the one I share my life with  
And I wish that you could be the one I die with  
And I pray in you're the one I build my home with  
I hope I love you all my life_

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am  
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

**He took a shaky breath and started singing again.**

_  
'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away  
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today  
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right  
And though I can't be with you tonight  
You know my heart is by your side_

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am  
Is there any way that I could stay in your arms

I thought that he was done and I began to stand up but I guess he wasn't done because the music started again and he began to sing again. This time he picked up a guitar and started to strum along as he sang.

**[Link to Song Also on my Profile]**

_He don't love you like I love you  
Don't think about you like I think about you  
He don't want to have your children  
He don't wanna build his life around you_

**I tried my best to stay hidden but I just kinda tripped over nothing and his eyes flashed up to mine and I was locked on his topaz eyes.**

Tell me I should not be feeling what I am today  
Tell me to silence my heart  
Tell me We've been here before  
and I will walk away from you love

For there is a wall between you and I  
And he hasn't been treating you right  
I've been watching it all  
I seen you cry  
And I just gotta tell you tonight

**My heart pounded in my chest and it felt like he was singing to me. **

_  
That he don't love you like I love you  
Don't think about you like I think about you  
He don't want to have your children  
He don't wanna build his life around you_

**How does he know that? That's not true. **

Tell me this love's just a feeling and will pass away  
Tell me your heart is a lier  
Tell me your not what I know you are  
All that a man could desire

_  
And he doesn't know, darlin, what he's got,  
But I will treasure you  
If you give me a chance I will make you smile  
I will give you a love that is true_

**But you already hurt me before, I gave you too many chances.**

But he don't love you like I love you  
Don't think about you like I think about you  
He don't want to have your children  
He don't wanna build his life around you

So why, can you not see,  
The place in your heart that was made for me  
Why must you hide yourself away?  
And why must you fight the way that I'm holding your hand tonight  
Take a chance and give your heart to me

**I blushed as he set the guitar down and walked over toward me and took my hand in his icy cold grasp and continued to sing to me. **

But he don't love you like I love you  
Don't think about you like I think about you  
He don't want to have your children  
He don't wanna build his life around you

But he don't love you like I love you  
Don't think about you like I think about you  
He don't want to have your children  
He don't wanna build his life around you

He kept a hold on my hand as the music faded away and stopped. I looked up at him and shook my head back and forth.

"Edward what are you doing?" I asked breathless.

"Bella, I love you." He said ardently, firmly grasping my hand still.

"Edward, Jasper is-" He cut me off.

"Jasper is home every night making eyes at Alice." He hissed

"That's not true!" I yelped and tried to pull from his grasp. "Jasper loves me, he told me, and he's going to change me and we're going to be together forever!" I said.

"Bella! Stop and look at what's right in front of you!" He hissed shaking me. "I love you! More than anything, it took time for me to realize why I was always so mad when I saw you or when I was near Jasper but I realized it was jealousy! That I want you to be mind and only mine, please Bella, you have to believe me. I wouldn't tell you this if it wasn't the truth." He whispered the last part and stared into my eyes.

"I'm with Jasper, Edward." I said quietly. "I won't hurt him." I said.

"He doesn't care! Him and Alice where-!"

"That's quite enough." I heard someone say and jumped when I saw Jasper behind us.

"Jasper!" I breathed and went to stand next to him, but Edward pulled me back into his arms.

"Tell her Jasper, tell her about you and Alice, how can you lie to her?! I can read your mind you dirty liar!" Edward roared at Jasper. I began to tremble…Edward didn't sound like he was lying, and the fact that he could read Jasper and Alice's minds would mean he would know the truth.

"J-Jasper…is…is that true?" I asked looking at him closely. When he didn't deny it right away I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. "Oh…oh I see." I said laughing to myself in pity. "Well then…I'll just see my way out then. Sorry for all the trouble." I said and ran past him to their front door.

On my way I ran into Alice, she looked at me closely, she didn't know what to do exactly. "Alice…" I said softly…

Her eyes snapped to mine and I felt the tears fall over.

"Be good to him, okay Alice?" I asked softly and she just nodded, and I took off out the front doors.

_How could I be so stupid!_ I yelled at myself. _I always knew he was too good for me this just proves it. _

I stumbled around the forest and tripped over a branch, I fell and scrapped my knee open, and decided to just lay there. Maybe I'd wither and die by the time morning came, life wasn't worth living anymore.

**

* * *

**

Thank you for being so patient.

**This story had a huge twist**

**and i know none of you saw it coming**

**but i just had a feeling**

**Maybe ill make the sequal soon???**

**REVIEW REVIEW CUZ I LOVE YOU**

**REVIEW REVIEW CUZ YOU LOVE ME TOO**

* * *


	21. Hey Guys!

SOOOOOO, I MIGHT BE COMING BACK.

LET ME KNOW OPINIONS.

AND IF I CAME BACK WOULD MY FANS STILL FOLLOW ME?

NEEDING MOTIVATION.

I'M NOW A PROUD MOTHER OF ONE BEATIFUL GIRL

AND A PROUD AUNTY OF A HANDSOME LITTLE BOY.

I WOULD NEED TO DEDICATE TIME TO WRITING.

ALSO WORKING A MIDNIGHT SHIFT.

I NEED TO KNOW YOU WOULD BE WILLING TO FOLLOW ME AGAIN !

AND WHICH STORIES YOU'D BE MOST EAGER TO SEE NEW CHAPTERS IN.

LET ME KNOW ASAP!

LYNN!


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